Archive for May, 2006

Day 396 – Friday 26th May 2006

Karen woke up in pain today. We have pinned it down (no pun intended) to her long strides and hydro.

Glenn and Mark came round to check out our bathrooms to see how much work is involved in converting them to kp’s master plan. After a cup of tea with them, kp went back to bed for a couple of hours.

Ig and Og (Margaret and Kathleen) arrived about 2.30pm, and we have had a good laugh with them. They are sisters and a real double act when together. kp has been in stitches.

It’s hard to get across how funny they are. But I’ll try………..

They were discussing a film, I can’t recall the name of it now………….

Ig :- You’ll have to see it…………..It’s brilliant

Og:- Yes, it’s 5 hours long………..

Ig:- The music is great………….

dp:- How does it go…………

Ig:- Tra la la la……….. (I was none the wiser !)

dp:- And it’s 5 hours long ?

Og:- Well, it might be 4 and a 1/2

dp:- Still, it’s a long film

Og:- But it’s good

Ig:- It might only be 4 hours long.

dp:- What’s it about ?

Ig:- It’s about Robert De Niro and James Cook (local Middlesbrough Hospital)…………

Og:-  Not James Cook, that’s the hospital, James Wood

dp:- But, what’s it about…………

Ig:- It’s about Robert De Niro, he’s a priest called Noodles……

Og:- No, that’s the other film

Etc Etc Etc…………

We are none the wiser, but feel better for the laughs it provided.

Here’s Ig, Og and kp……….Don’t ask me which is Ig and which is Og, ‘cos I don’t know.

Ig, kp and Og

A good laugh was had by all……Lamb Stew tonight.

Day 396 – Friday 26th May 2006 – Addendum

I don’t think kp has laughed as much for a long time. These 2 guests were like Les Dawson and Roy Barraclough doing their women’s gossiping, whilst occasionally hunching their breasts up.

Quote of the Night (talking about speying a bitch)

Og:- Anyway, they had it …………  what’s that word Marge ?

Ig:- Speyed

Og:- Aye, they had it spaded.

Many more classics – hopefully kp will remember some more and I’ll add them in. Kathleen (Og) managed to talk non-stop from the moment she came until the moment she went to bed, and every other line was funny as hell.

Day 397 + 398 – Saturday /Sunday 27/8th May 2006

Saturday

We got up early for breakfast with Ig and Og.

Ig and Of in the Garden

…and then dropped them off at Durham Bus Station before heading for Jane and Guy’s (Bury, Lancashire).

It was great to see them all again so soon after the holiday and the kids were so much closer to us than pre-holiday. Jamie was all over Karen which was really great to see.

We went bathroom hunting in Burnley and then came back for Roast Lamb, cooked in Jane’s aga. It was lovely, finished with mum’s home made strawberries and ice cream.
Sunday

Today, we came home after a thoroughbly enjoyable weekend. On the way home, kp got to asking health-related questions like ….

kp:- When do you think my arm will be better ?

kp:- When do you think my walking will be better ?

kp:- When do you think my personality will be back ?

kp:- Do you think I will ever drive again ?
I told her I never thought the arm would get as good as it has, but that I expect it will continue to improve for another year or so. As for walking, there is probably a big improvement coming after her hernia op and then another 1 to 2 years improvement, but gradual improvement after that. Driving again ? I asked her why she didn’t feel like she could drive now ? She feels that she doesn’t trust her eyes enough. By this, she means, physical eyesight and the inattention she has in her left field of vision. There are also physical issues, such as clutch control (in her stroke leg) and steering with one hand, but there are ways round this.

As for personality, I told her that if she had asked the question to most people about her personality, they would have said she was exactly the same person as she was pre-accident. She feels she doesn’t have the confidence she had before and she doesn’t join in as much. I tried to reassure her that this wasn’t the case, but she feels strongly, that she isn’t the same kp as pre-accident. I reassured her that it would get better over time, but it would be very, what’s the word I am after, innocuous, surreptitious, something like that.

She has been a very anxious passenger in both directions this weekend. I wound the window down in Barnard Castle, and she awoke from her snooze very alarmed. Her car travelling seems to be getting worse, rather than better, will have to keep an eye on this !

Day 399 – Monday 29th May 2006

Sleepy day.

Bad night for kp and she didn’t get up until 3.15pm.

She told me of a funny that happened during the night. Apparently, I had been snoring a lot and she had to keep nudging me, no change there. But this one time, she was dreaming and could hear snoring again. She found herself shouting in her dream and out loud……………

kp:- Who is that snoring ?

kp:- Oh, it’s me !

Made me laugh.

:-)

Not much else happening today.

Day 400 – Tuesday 30th May 2006

Poor kp :-(

The day started off ok. Because of kp’s late awakening yesterday, I had forgotten to apply her 25mg Fentanyl Patch. Today, she knew about it. In the middle of the night, I caught her a couple of times moaning with pain as she turned over. This, in itself, isn’t unusual, but the severity of the moan told me it was more pain than usual :-(

This is when we both realised that we hadn’t applied her patch. I applied both the 100mg and 25mg patch in the hope of catching the pain, but it hasn’t really helped even at 6.10pm when I write this blog.

But, this morning (11am onwards), she didn’t really let this get her down and plodded on as per usual.

Today, we had the meeting with the consultant who will be performing what we hope will be kp’s last op. He was a lovely bloke. kp has had a number of encounters with Asian Doctors and was worried that she wouldn’t be able to understand him, but his english was excellent and he was very professional and knowledgeable. I can hear my mum’s genes in me at this moment.

“He was asian, but he could speak lovely english and he was fully qualified you know !” ;-)

The last op is to sort out Karen’s hernia (which is huge).

He examined kp standing up and then lying down and pushed her stomach skin in such a way that you could see her intestines and bowels. It was weird ! He explained how he would be able to get rid of the HUGE scar that runs from just under kp’s “insert posh word for tits” right down to above her “insert medical term for above panty line“.

You’ve heard of “pinch an inch”. Well, this chap showed how much excess stomach skin kp has and grabbed loads of it and showed what she would like after the op. I was amazed and told the doctor so.

dp:- You’re gonna look like Britney Spears when you’re done love.

It REALLY did look like kp was going to be coming out SO much thinner.

The doctor replied that Britney isn’t thin any more, but that’s the only person that came to mind. The hernia has made kp’s stomach skin stretch so much, the doctor was confident he could remove the old scar 100% ! Great news !

Apparently, the procedure is called an “Incisional Hernia”. Compared to a normal hernia, where he only has to stitch up an inch’s worth of stomach muscles. In kp’s case, he will have to stitch up about a foot’s worth ! A normal hernia op takes 10-15 minutes. kp’s operation would take 2 hours !

He may not be able to bring all the muscles together, but where he couldn’t he would use a mesh to make up the holes remaining. He also explained that kp may not get full strength back to her stomach muscles as they have been more than a year in this weakened seperated state.

It all sounded great. kp and I were hoping to fit the op in sometime around the start of July so she could stay the required 5-7 days in hospital and then she could have the 8-10 weeks recovery time at home before our August holiday.

Then came the bad news. As it wasn’t a cancer or anything life threatening, we would have to go on the waiting list, which currently stands at “at least 6 months”.

We explained that we understood. I asked how soon could she be seen if she went private.

Doctor X:- I could see her next week.
Money talks it seems.

He gave us the number of the local Bupa hospital and the name of the chap to get a price from. I would be calling him as soon as we got home.

On the way home from the hospital, we went shopping at Sainsburys. kp’s walking is still slow. The fast walk she tried the other week caused her so much grief, she has reverted to the 1mph cruising version. So, I have developed a nice little routine, where she walks down the centre aisle and I say something like……

dp:- I’m just gonna get some Broccoli.

kp ends up walking the supermarket mostly down the centre aisle, but it works.

When we got to the desserts, kp wanted to look for herself. She stared at this mass array of desserts………

kp:- I can’t see a bloody thing !

It’s the right (crappy) vision confusing the left vision scenario again. I told her to cover her right eye and lo and behold, she could see things much clearer, but she still has the stroke-related problem of finding it hard to pick things out that she is looking for.

kp 1 eye

Shopping over, we returned home and phoned the BUPA hospital.

£2080 for the op. I was over the moon. I had visions of it being £5000. So, we are going to go private. kp straight away worried about the money. She had earmarked it for a new bathroom we are planning, but I am confident that we should be able to get that back from the insurance claim in due course.

So, it all sounds good so far.

kp’s family phoned to see how she had got on. And that’s where the day turned, big time :-(

kp got very very upset. She put the phone down and “discussed” it with me in floods of tears.
kp:- I am sick of everything.

kp (SHOUTING):- I am SICK OF IT, SICK OF IT !

dp:- What are you sick of love ?

kp:- I am sick of feeling like this ! I’m sick of walking like an old woman. My eyes don’t work. I can’t see things properly. I shouldn’t have to have another operation.

She went onto explain that she didn’t want to go in to hospital again and that she was frightened something might happen. I tried to reassure has as best I could. She knows that she has to get it done and that she will feel better for it, but the fear is still there.

kp:- I feel angry. For the first time, I feel angry about me being in this situation.

This is a first. kp has not had the slightest bit of anger until now. Another step in the grieving process no doubt.

So……30 mins ago, she went to bed crying. She wanted to be on her own. Tea is ready shortly, and hopefully she will feel better for that.

Day 401 – Wednesday 31st May 2006

A better day today.

First of all, a few things I forgot from yesterday.

Corset – Apparently, kp will have to wear a corset for a weeks after her op. Should be a laff !

Going to Die – kp is convinced she is going to die in the upcoming operation, obviously I have reassured that she won’t, but I still don’t think she is convinced.
Helping Hands – I was doing something yesterday, and all I could hear was cups clattering and dropping. I thought she was emptying the top shelf of the dishwasher or something. It turns out she was using her “helping hands”. This is a device that she has been given that help her get things from the floor or high places. It’s a pair of grips with a long handle and a trigger. It turns out she was trying to get a cup down for a cup of tea. Well, she definately got a cup down. I think I counted 2 or 3 on the floor when I went in ;-)

So, today, kp is feeling more positive. Angela came round for a natter.

Angela and kp

It was good to catch up on how she is dealing with everything, how our solicitors are faring etc etc…..

And then Marie, Michelle and Ethan arrived with lunch. The sisters spent most of the time gabbing in the back garden (it was a lovely day).

Sisters

Unsurprisingly, Ethan wasn’t that keen talking with the oldies and was more interested in battering people and wrecking cars in an Xbox game. Sorry about this photo. But if you look carefully, you can see the person he was playing in the game on the tv screen.

Ethan and San Andreas

Tomorrow it’s hydro and then more bathroom showrooms. :-!







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