Archive for December, 2007

Day 942 to 956 – Sunday 25th November to Sunday 9th December 2007

Well, 2-week gap in the blog as we went darn sarth to see family and friends for a week and didn’t get back until late Sunday night.

The big news is that I divorced Karen last week and remarried. Younger woman. Read on….

On the first Sunday, we took a train to London Kings Cross, taxi’ed to Waterloo (kp can’t do tubes anymore), and then a train to Surbiton, where we met up with Ronnie. Here is kp on the train……..this was as exciting as the journey got.


Ronnie took us to our hotel. It was the Holiday Inn Chessington and very nice it was too, apart from the fact that they could only accommodate us for 4 of the 5 nights.

I was down there on a course for work. kp came to spend the week with Ronnie. The course was great and Ronnie and kp had a great time. On the monday, kp and Ronnie went to be part of the audience of Loose Women. When kp relayed the events of the day to me, all she talked about (instead of the show itself) was that the audience were mental. It sounded like they were professional (albeit not paid) TV show attendees, and not a full shilling amongst them.

Tuesday, after my course, we all went to London to see Joseph and the Technicolour Dreamcoat at the Adelphi. It was a cracking show with a super Joseph mix at the end which earned a standing ovation. Everyone in the house was up on the feet, apart from the chap next to me. He didn’t clap once.

On one of the days, Ronnie and kp went to see Keith and Irene (VD’s mum/dad who she knew from being a kid). They had a nice afternoon with them.

kp’s pain is starting to get a bit out of control at the moment. A walk round some shops, or steps, can take it out of her, and we are currently using TWICE as much morphine patches as is currently allowed. We are seeing the doctor tomorrow to beg them to up it beyond the maximum allowed dosage, but I don’t hold out much hope. :-( kp is focussed on the Dorsal Column Stimulation as the solution and me too !

On the thursday, we checked out, and slept at Ronnie’s on the night. vd did us a lovely roast meal. All the local hotels were booked up for a big conference. vd took me to the last day of the course, and picked me up with kp in the car, dropping us at the station to take the train to So’ton.

It was great to see the Maffey’s again. They have got a new addition to the family since our last visit (Thomas). Here he is with Megan.


We had a lovely weekend with them. Very relaxed, and lots of good chat.

Megan (5 years old) and I get on great. A few months ago, when she knew I was coming down, she had said that she wanted to marry me. So, on the Sunday, we had the ceremony. I divorced Karen moments before Megan walked in. She had her fairy dress on. She walked up the aisle (front room between the 11 jigsaws she had done) with her Dad to give her away. Marge was my best man, and Tracey was the vicar. It was a good laugh.

On the Sunday, we had another good chatting day with a super Sunday lunch at the Lone Barn before flying home on the Sunday night.

I think I recorded in the blog that we had changed solicitors recently, because of the lack of communications between our old one and the incumbent. So far, so good. The new solicitor could NOT have been more proactive and communicative. When we returned from the trip darn sarth, we had 3 letters from her. She has now received all the files relating to Karen’s case and we were flabbergasted to learn that the old solicitor (Watson Ramsbottom, from Blackburn, Lanacashre) had known about the Case Manager for 18 (EIGHTEEN) months without saying a word about it !!!!! Karen is so angry about this and I can’t blame her. Already with the new solicitor, we have lots of appointments lined up with consultants. More physio starts on Tuesday, photos to be taken of all her scars, support worker, occupational therapist, neuropsychologist etc etc….Things are starting to move !!

My work has been quite eventful for the last 2 weeks (even the week I was away). My best mate and my boss (in the Datacentre), Nigel, had resigned. He didn’t want to leave, but his position had been made untenable by the MD. Part of the reason I had offered to step down from my previous management post was that I found the MD incredibly hard to work for. Moving goalposts, micro-management, acting on tittle-tattle from other managers without getting the full facts, saying one thing, doing another – it was unlike any other management post I had been in etc etc etc…..

Conversation inevitably turned to who was going to take his role. I made it clear to the MD that I couldn’t work for him again (in a management context). Lots of VERY frank discussions occurred between all parties involved and the upshot of them all is that I am going to take the role on a 6-month trial with someone else between me and the MD. Fingers crossed on that front…..

This week, Karen’s pain has remained the main issue. The sleeping is still all to pot, but compared to the pain, it’s something she can cope with.

Day 957 to 963. Monday 10th December to Sunday 16th December 2007.

Well, let me get the dp work news out of the way first. All change on the ITPS front. For various reasons, I am now not taking the Datacentre Management role. It’s a decision I am very happy with and a big weight off my mind. I have said I will give the company 6 months commitment to get them through the sticky patch of Nigel leaving, and then will review the status quo thereafter.

On the kp front, it’s been quite an eventful week, with a jam-packed week coming up.

On Tuesday, a photographer came to the house to take pictures of all kp’s scars (back of the head, fatty leg lumps, missing section of her arse etc etc….). We were just expecting it to be a 10 minute job, but it took him 20 minutes to set up his studio in the hall.

Big white backdrop and all ! Not the nicest experience for kp, but she battled through. In the afternoon, she had the first visit from the new physio (one of the many treatments sorted by Syd the Case Manager). She got on great with him and he really is a nice bloke.

Thursday saw the physio return for another session. Tuesday was mostly an assessment, as was Thursday. I arrived back about 6.30pm on thursday and he was still there. I was greeted by a kp in tears and a physio saying all the right things to cheer her up. I asked why she was upset, and the answer was…..

kp:- Because I have done so well.


I couldn’t understand at all, and had to have another 2 explanations to even get close to understanding the upset and even then I pretended I understood so as not to look too foolish in front of the physio.

When he left, we discussed it at length and basically, she was upset because she had done really well, but had it not been for the morphine, she wouldn’t have been able to do any of it. That was the nub of it.

He had had her on the floor. Oops. That sounds bad, let me rephrase. He had had her getting onto the floor. Lying on the floor, rolling around on the floor, now it sounds bad again. Basically, he had got her to get on the floor and move around a bit. By all accounts, she did really well, and the physio is genuinely a really nice bloke !

On thursday night, Jane came over to spend the night. We had the usual hoot of a night, JB having us in stitches as she does. They phoned Ronnie and tried to organise a January holiday abroad, but they didn’t get it completed on the night.

On Saturday, kp took a taxi over to Middlesbrough (for Sister’s Day). It’s an annual day where kp and her sisters get together for games and stuff. It’s a girly day and Adele and Abbie were there too. They had a great time, although kp didn’t feel too good about the day.

She felt like “she didn’t fit in any more”. I KNOW if you ask the sisters they will say she does, but she can’t help this feeling that things aren’t the same. Very sad !

Karen came back in a taxi with Ethan (10-year old great nephew) and he stayed the night. We had a good time with him. He was over the moon that I had found some cheats on t’internet for Grand Theft Auto and that the cars now flew ! It was comical to see him SOOOO excited.

And today has been mostly a day of watching flying cars etc….

Tonight, we’ll probably watch some tv, have dinner and then bed.

This week is a busy week for kp. All the new treatments are kicking in.

Monday – Occupational Therapist
Tuesday – Speech Therapist
Wednesday – Physio
Thursday – Syd the Case Manager
Friday – Hair Appointment and next
Sunday – Speech Therapy again.

Things are really starting to head in the right direction !

Day 964 to 970. Monday 17th December to Sunday 23rd December 2007

Busy week for kp this week. A visit every day by one specialist or another. Physio came twice I think.

In a nutshell…….

Physio – Wobbleboard. This is kp’s new toy. Basically, the physio has assessed that kp’s balance is poor and she needs to improve it. With this aim in mind, he has brought a wobbleboard. Basically it’s like a wood circular board on top of a ball and she has to sit on it (whilst it’s on the table), and try and keep her balance. When she has cracked that, she has to do the same but standing on it. I have tried it, and it’s bloody hard, although to be fair I was a bit tipsy, but nonetheless it is challenging.

OT – Assessments

Speech Therapist (2 visits) – Assessments galore. Preliminary findings reveal that kp’s problem with words and conversation relate to more neuro reasons than speech issues – no big surprise there.

The Case Manager also came out for an update.

The only tears this week have been for Elsa (one of our German Shepherds) who wasn’t well on friday. Elsa has the prettiest face of any dog on the planet (obviously a little bias here), and she has the biggest “puppy dog” eyes. When she was ill, she was not getting up, hiding in corners, managing the feeblest wag if you made a big fuss. She had been sick SOOOO many times, we could tell something was wrong. Straight away, with dogs, we just think they are going to peg it. But, today, she has been much improved, so hopefully she has just had a 24-hour bug or something. She still hasn’t eaten all day as far as we can tell. But, a pigs ear seems to have been well received so things look promising.

Today, we have been doing the present run, going to all kp’s family to drop off presents.

Been a lovely day.

Pain seems to be well under control. About a week ago, the doctor begrudgingly allowed us to double the pain relief, so she is now officially on double the maximum of the morphine patches that she should be on. The only way he would do it is by only giving us a week’s supply at a time, which is a pain, but better than the alternative.

Sleep remains the dominant issue. She is just all over the shop.

I am working tomorrow (Xmas Eve), but then am off until 7th Jan, so we should enjoy some good time together !

Mum and Dad’s for Xmas Day.


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