Day 1127 to 1131 – Monday 19th to Friday 23rd May 2008

Better week generally.

Being blessed with good weather always seems to help kp’s mood. And she made the most of it on monday with a day of gardening. Doreen did the heavy work, and boy, did she do a good job. Well done Doreen and kp of course.

Tuesday saw kp go to get her hair and nails done. Steve (physio) came in the afternoon and they took the dogs out for a walk down the railway line. By the railway line is a downward slope to a stream, which the dogs ALWAYS go down to swim in the stream, but kp and I never do, but Steve got kp to go down by the stream. Well, the dogs couldn’t believe their luck and went absolutely manic with excitement. Steve got kp to do some balancing on old fallen trees. kp was really pleased with what she did.

Wednesday and Bonnie was wincing in pain. We think she was so excited the day before that she has overdone her hips (German Shepherds suffer from bad hips as they get older). So that was quite sad to see. I met up with kp and Doreen at the Lansdowne Clinic in Gosforth for a session with Jane (a clinical psychologist) mid-morning. It went very well, and we both took to her and think she can do a lot of good for kp. Of course, it wasn’t without upset. kp was fine until about 10 minutes before the end, when Karen asked …..

kp:- So, how do I accept that I won’t be the person I was before.
Jane :- Well, some people find it helpful to think of it as a journey from the person to that you were before, to the person you are going to be. And what we will try and do is to take as much of the person you were before on this journey, to this new you.

Well, she put it much better than that !

She gave some examples of real people who had “made the journey” and how their lives were different to their old lives, but that they enjoyed their new lives.

One of Karen’s biggest problems is that she has accepted the ramifications of the accident. It’s a bit like the 5 stages of grieving when you lose someone close to you. ….

Denial – The accident hasn’t happened
Anger  – What have I done to deserve this ?
Bargaining – Well, if I put 110% into my rehab, I WILL get back to my old self
Depression – Why bother ?
Acceptance – Actually, I have had an accident which HAS changed my life and it isn’t so bad after all

My take is that Karen has done Denial, Anger (which still recurs but less frequently), and is currently in the Bargaining/Depression stage.

I think Time and Jane’s sessions will definitely help move kp to a better place.

So, a few tears towards the end of the session with Jane. I went back to work, and the girls went to Peter Barratt’s Garden Centre and enjoyed a nice meal and bought some gardening goodies.

Matt (Speech Therapy) came in the afternoon and Karen soon broke down in tears. The upset geared around her not knowing how to make the transition from where she is now, to where she needs to be to enjoy life. They didn’t do any session work and I think Matt was so worried he phoned Syd (Case Manager) to share his concerns with him (I think, ‘cos Syd phoned that night).

Syd came round the following morning and had a long chat with Karen. When Doreen arrived, they lunched at home. Steve came at 4pm and they did “balancing on the ball”. Steve had previously brought around this large ball (that people do exercises with). But this session was also not without the tears. Steve was trying to expain to Karen how to do this certain exercise and Karen just couldn’t understand what he was saying. After numerous repeats of the information, Steve said….

Steve :- You’re making this more complicated than it is.

Karen got upset at this, because she felt like it was her that was being “stupid”. This is a good example of Karen and instructions. They have to be very short for her to understand them because of her small “working memory”. Steve knew he had explained it badly and apologised and showed her what he meant (re the exercise), and Karen could get it fine that way. Karen told Steve that she wouldn’t remember this for the next session so he would have to show her again.

Minor hiccup !

Another good example of how this kind of thing accepts Karen is Thursday night. We had decided to try and get into a good series of programmes (like Lost, 24 etc…) where there had already been a few series on the TV, so we could buy the boxset and watch one a night.

Well, I had got the first 2 episodes of “West Wing” and we thought we would try the first one. Well, it was EXTREMELY fast-paced and I could tell Karen wasn’t getting it, so we passed on that series. We’ll try something else. It’s quite sad really, ‘cos she would have previously enjoyed it.

Friday saw a quieter day for Karen. Marie and Glenn came over to pick something up and kp enjoyed their company plus the company of Strike (Marie’s dog).

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