A mixed day today. Laughter and Tears.

Let’s shed the tears first.

Karen got very upset today. She said she had been crying a lot of the night as well. I think she is realising the extent of her predicament.

Every day I read out the comments people have put on this website and as I read last night’s comment, Karen started crying. She is so touched by people’s concern and the overwhelming response she has had both in the form of text messages and blog comments. I don’t think she understands how well thought of she is. And the comments last night (which were all wonderfully encouraging) touched her.

It’s funny, in hindsight, I should have seen the signs. When I offer to read out the texts I have had (over 150), she can only take a few being read out. When I read out the cards from her colleagues at the blood service, I do a few and she says “enough”. She also received a single (large) card from Blood Service colleagues which must have about 30-40 good will messages (20 either page). I could only read the left hand page out before she said “enough”. So, apologies to the colleagues who signed the right hand page – as far as Karen is concerned, you don’t care about her !! That is a joke btw !!!! Karen is only too well aware of how much everyone is rooting for her !!

For the first time today, I read out the previous day’s blog entry that I had written and this upset her also. I won’t be doing that again. Karen, one day, will appreciate the blog, but its too early for her to hear her predicament (even though yesterday’s entry was all positive).

The reading out of the blog prompted the following conversation :-

kp (upset) :- I am 40 and I have had a stroke. That isn’t good is it.
dp :- Actually you’re 42, but I like the way you knocked a couple of years off. Very slick !

So, let’s end the tears. Karen is realising that she is not a well woman, but we tried to reassure how far she has come, and that she is doing remarkably well and everyone is SOOOO proud of her.

On the laughter front. Karen had some GREAT moments today.

One of the auxiliary nurses was reading out the menu for lunch.

Alan (aux.nurse) :- “Would you like Soup or Orange Juice………….Cottage Pie or Vol au Vents”
Now Alan pronounced Vol Au Vents in true english fashion. He pronounced Vents as “he vents his anger”

Karen spotted this straight away and the biggest smirk appeared on her face as Alan carried on reading the desserts out. I was nudging her arm when she smirked confirming the mispronunciation.

kp:- I don’t want the “vol au vents” (copying Alan’s mispronunciation) and I don’t want “Vol au vents” either (kp pronouncing it correctly).

Alan was laughing. kp was laughing holding her belly because she was so amused.

Poor Alan copped it for the rest of the day and kp kept calling him Mr “Vol au Vents”. Alan is the same chap (mentioned in an earlier blog) who was involved in the “getting her leg over” incident.

Karen had a good feed today. They have stopped feeding her intravenously and through her nose so from today, she has to eat real food. She ate a 1/4 of a plate of cottage pie and a couple of tubs of ice cream !!

Another incident that provoked a painful kp belly laugh was when I was describing to Karen how at the other hospital I had seen a 14 year old girl in the waiting room who had jeans that just about covered the hip and her knickers were showing well above the jeans. (Very fashionable apparently). So I showed Karen with my “knickers” what she looked like but pulling my sexy Y-fronts up above my jeans. The Queen was amused !

Another time Karen had us in stitches is when she did an impression of one of the Asian Doctors (Dr Krishna). Apparently he had come over to her bed and said “How are you Karen ?” but with a very asian accent. He pronounced Karen as “Kaaaaaarennnn” ? So Dr Krishna was around her bed with a couple of nurses hovering as well, and she did an impression of how Dr Krishna had woken her up with his “How are you Kaaaaaaarennnnnn ?”

Dr Krishna, the nurses, Karen and family were laughing.

So, in summary, Karen had her down moments today and her up moments. It was quite an exhausting day for karen today and the upset took it out of her. We left her with one of the nose oxygen masks (that you see on Casualty) to keep her oxygen levels up (because they were a little on the low side) (nothing to worry about !).

When I went to leave at 8pm, she was fast asleep. Of course, I had to kiss her good night and she woke up. But only a sleepy awakeness. I said “Good Night, go back to sleep” and her eyelids went heavy again.

Good Night kp

In the next edition of Karen’s blog we should have some interesting reading !!!!

The nurses have suggested I bring in our 3 German Shepherds to see Karen tomorrow. (The meeting with the dogs will take place outside. kp will be wheeled out on her bed). I am sh+tting myself because they will be so excited to see her, they will jump on her bed and open up all her wounds !!!! I will bring them to see her one by one, but still it will be an interesting day tomorrow. Expect there to be some part-eaten nurses and a kp that has more wounds than today.

A day of mixed emotions.

I rang the Intensive Care Unit and asked to speak to Karen. Wanted to tell her I wouldn’t be in until 1pm because I was bringing the dogs. The nurse checked if Karen could speak and came back and explained

Nurse :- “She can’t speak at the moment because she is having physio and anyway she is fast asleep.”

I was laughing to myself at the thought of Karen getting a workout whilst fast asleep.

The day started with tears. I brought the dogs to see Karen, and one by one I got them out of the car and took them to Karen’s bed. First Dog was Cleo. I didn’t want to risk them jumping on kp so I lifted Cleo to kp so she could stroke him.

Immediately she got upset. She had a good stroke and then on with the next dog (Bonnie). I tried lifting her to Karen, but she doesn’t like to be lifted, so I took her on the lead and as soon as she saw Karen she launched herself completely in the air ONTO kp’s bed. Jesus Tonight. kp’s stomach is still not fully stitched up so I nearly laid an egg. Thankfully, I immediately yanked the chain and although all 4 paws touched the bed, they immediately landed back on the ground. Phew ! Bonnie then jumped up with her 2 front paws and let kp have a good stroke.

Elsa was the last and least trouble

Karen was tearful throughout. But I know she was glad she had seen the dogs. I think it must bring home to her what she is missing

More tears followed at about 3pm when kp was ready for visitors again. Marie, Michelle, Jane + myself were round kp’s bed and she was very quiet for quite a long time. She beckoned Michelle to come closer. kp wanted a hug. Very unusual (as those who know kp will be only too well aware). kp hugged Michelle and started crying. Michelle started crying, Marie started crying, Jane started crying and I stood there like a lemon. I must be all out of tears today. kp was upset. She is definately realising the depth of her situation as each day passes. Now I am crying. I feel so sorry for her. She has come through so much, battled so hard – she doesn’t understand how far she has come, and she is just realising how ill she was and is and that she has a long road to travel. She is very frustrated having to lie in bed 24/7. Who can blame her ?

For a lot of the afternoon, she was uncomfortable as she had been positioned on her right hand side. She asks me to get someone to ease her discomfort, which of course I do, even though I know that comfort is hard to find for kp with all her sores etc….

One of the nurses came over and sat down with kp and had a good chat to her. He explained that for the last 3 weeks she had been unconscious and the hard times were experienced by David and the rest of the family. But now it was time for her big struggle. He was down to earth and told her that she was in for 1 helluva fight. She WOULD be uncomfortable. She would hurt each day and she had to fight through it all.

Nurse:- Over the next few weeks and months, you will be calling David every name under the sun.

(No change there then

Nurse:- You will be pushed to your limits by the nurses because they want you to get better. But the biggest thing you will come up against is frustration etc….

It was a cracking spiel the nurse said (he used to work on a stroke rehab ward) and it really let kp and I know that hell is on the way, but that together we can crack it.

So quite a sad day overall, but it did have its highs later in the afternoon.

Jane, Marie and Michelle were by kp’s bedside and were waiting for her to wake up. They were bored so they started singing to kp. We have worked out that we can tell when kp is awake by her heartrate on one of the monitors. When its about 60, she is out for the count and 70+ she is on the way to consciousness, 80+ and she is awake. So it was 60 and the girls were singing songs from the 70′s in the style of pub singers. I wasn’t there but apparently the girls were in stitches at their own performances.

kp’s heartrate rose to 70. So they thought they were getting close. It stayed like that for a while as the girls carried on their renditions, until kp woke up. One of the sisters said

Sister :- We have been singing to you !! Songs from the 70′s.
kp :- I know. But I thought if I kept my eyes shut, you might stop.

Another highlight of the day was when my mum and dad visited.

As soon as she saw mum and dad, she waved at them and the biggest smile came across her face. I bet Karen 5 quid that dad would cry within 10 seconds of her talking. You owe me 5 quid kp !!!!

Mum and Dad could see such a big difference. She was talking, joking and full of the essence of kp. They were thrilled to see such an improvement. It had been 10 days since their last visit.

When they left to go to kp+dp’s house (to do the ironing (thanks Mum !)), Marie and I stayed on. Karen was very quiet. Solemn. Sad. She hardly said a word. She was exhausted. She was fed up.
It’s awful to see her like that. It’s at times like this, I wish the driver of the van could be aware of how much pain he has caused her, Angela and Kevin (and their families and friends). 2 years driving ban ain’t enough !!

Until tomorrow…..

The Day with the “Acorn Antiques” Program

Today started with tears. Not from kp, but me. When kp had the accident, we had lined up a number of events for the year. kp was going to see “Fame” & “Love Shack” at the Sunderland Empire, “Billy Elliott”, “Mary Poppins” and the show we were both REALLY looking forward to “Acorn Antiques” (in London). The London shows were Karen’s birthday present to me, although I was only too well aware that Karen was REALLY looking forward to Acorn Antiques as she loves both Victoria Wood AND Julie Walters. Acorn Antiques is only running for 6 months and we had tickets to the last day (matinee performance).

Obviously the accident prevented from Karen from seeing all of the above. So…after we had got over the first 10 days and kp had pulled through, I started to do something about the tickets. We gave the local tickets “Fame” and “Love Shack” to the Intensive Care Unit at the hospital in thanks for the truly incredible care they have given Karen. Karen can be demanding when she is well, and they have put up with her when she is unwell. They are awesome. (I kept warning Karen that if she didn’t behave they will sedate her until she is off the ward !)

I put the other tickets up on Ebay for sale. The Acorn Antiques landed in the hands of a gentleman called David Lodge who had bought them for his mother (who is caring for her husband who has lung cancer). Karen lost her mother to Lung Cancer, so she was thrilled that the tickets ended up in the hands of people who deserved it, and who would also really appreciate the show.

David said he would give us a show report and sure enough it came through the post today. He had sent the Acorn Antiques programme for Karen and the loveliest of letters. His letter really touched me. He described in detail key moments of the performance, but what really got to me was the email he had sent to the theatre (a copy of which he included with the letter) :-

David’s Email :-
“Dear Sirs I am writing for two reasons

First of all I would like to thank you for the advice I was given in looking at Ebay for tickets I will be coming to the show for the Saturday matinee and cant wait! ! !

Far more importantly I hope that you can help me with something???

I bought the tickets (Stalls 03&4) trom a guy called David Pollard who had ordered them as a birthday present for his wife Karen. Tragically on April 27th, Karen was involved in a serious car accident and nearly died. She has been in Hospital ever since.

David has posted on the web a diary over the last few weeks that makes for heart breaking reading KPSCONDITION.BLOGSPOT.COM. I have never met these people and dont know why I am doing this but feel compelled to act! Do please check out the website!!! I will forward the email I have received from David (as a thank you for the tickets) to show I am not some nutter.

Could you PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE pass this email and information onto Julie WaIters and Victoria Wood because Karen is a huge fan and was so looking forward to seeing the show but will now never get to see it. If that is not possible could you please
get a program signed or some Acorn Antiques memorabilia that I can send to Sunderland General Hospital for Karen to know that if she was not at the theatre in person she will be there in spirit with me.

I can assure you that I have never done anything like this in my entire life and the chances of me getting to hear this story was very remote but it is for some reason that I do not understand – it feels like Gods Will that I should do something about it to make Karen smile!

Your help in this matter I am sure will be greatly appreciated by Karen Pollard and all her family who must be going thru hell. For me I want nothing other than to know that for once I actually did something for no real reason other than caring!!! !

Kindest Regards

DAVID LODGE”

David doesn’t know us. Yet he went out of his way to do something for Karen. David, I am exceedingly grateful. He also added that he knows someone who knows Victoria Wood well and that if the theatre couldn’t help he would try the other route. No worries if nothing comes of the second route David, we are touched by your sentiments beyond words.

Well, reading his letter and email reduced me to tears. Karen’s strength and determination have touched so many people. I take great solace from this. More about this later.

Back to Karen

Karen had real problems sleeping last night. They gave her a sleeping tablet which helped a bit. When I went in at 12pm she had eaten a quarter of her meal (roast chicken, stuffing, the works). The nurses were pleased.

She also looked different. She had had her nose tube removed as it was felt she was eating well enough that she didn’t need to be fed through her nose. Her bowel management system had also been removed and she had undergone 2 hours of physio. On the first day, she could only manage 10 minutes.

We found out today that one of the fantastic consultants on the Intensive Care Unit had asked that she be moved to the Stroke Rehab ward instead of the Orthopedic Ward. It was felt that she would gain more from her being where she would be taxed (from a stroke perspective) with the orthopedic people visiting, than being on the orthopedic ward being visited by the stroke people. This seems right to me.

The move would have happened today had they had a bed spare on the stroke ward. Alas they didn’t. Actually I take that back. The fact she is well enough to move to a normal ward is good enough for us. She couldn’t get better care than where she is at the moment (one nurse to one patient, and fantastic nurses at that).

Maybe tomorrow for Ward 3.

Knowing that kp was moving off ICU, I asked to see one of the consultants for an update on kp’s condition. She was VERY pleased with Karen’s progress and she said the one thing we wanted to hear. Karen is no longer critical and she “would be VERY surprised if Karen DIDN’T pull through this”. For the first time, we have officially heard that the odds are in kp’s favour. I would go further than that and say Karen’s life is no longer in danger and that she now has to concentrate in probably the hardest battle of all – rehabilitation.

This is a big weight off the family’s minds. We have kind of felt this anyway for the last few days, but to hear it officially from the same lady who gave Karen a 5% chance of pulling through the first few days carries a great deal of weight. Thanks CONSULTANT (name withheld at request of hospital) – for your honesty and frankness. We appreciated it when we were told the bad odds and we definately appreciate it now !!!

We then had a bit of sadness. The consultant (in the presence of Karen) was trying to get across to Karen how far she has come and she told Karen that we nearly lost her a couple of times in the first few days. Karen broke down at hearing this. Although I have told her similar things before (to illustrate how far she had come), she had never heard this from the professionals. Karen REALLY doesn’t understand how good a fight she has put up and how wonderful she is. The consultant was great and she comforted Karen. Marie and I added our additional support.

This played on Karen’s mind for the rest of the day, but I will return to this later.

I grabbed the consultant privately to confirm that Karen was out of danger. I didn’t want to ask this in front of Karen (perhaps this was wrong), but I was chuffed to hear the news that I mentioned earlier.

After the consultant left, one of the paramedics (who helped get Karen out of the car), stopped by to see how Karen was. This is the first time Karen had met Jayne since the accident and the first time Jayne had seen Karen since she was out of danger. We had a few more tears as Jayne related some of the facts of the accident to Karen. She told Karen how brave she was and how she had been cursing the firemen, because they couldn’t decide the best way to cut her out.

Karen :- “Why is it taking so long to get me out of here. I bet there is a man behind this decision”

When all of these visitors had gone, I started reading out last night’s blog comments (and text messages) to Karen, leaving the “Acorn Antiques” things till the end. Karen loves hearing the messages of support.

dp:- Now, I have something special to show you.

I revealed the “Acorn Antiques” program and explained its origin.

I then read out the letter (detailing the Acorn Antiques show) and email to Karen. She was VERY moved by it and got very upset. I think she couldn’t believe that someone would do this for her. This constantly amazes me. I read out all the texts, blog comments etc…. And she just can’t believe that she is so well thought of. I keep thinking back to the thought that she obviously doesn’t understand how far she has come and how much so many people care about her.

Thanks David again for this. You have definately helped bring home how much feeling there is out there for Karen.

We have had many laughs today. Karen enjoyed seeing her brother-in-law David Gall today. And she had a good crack with him about “boring Dave”.

Tomorrow will probably see her being moved to Ward 3. Visiting Hours are 11am – 1pm, 4pm – 8pm. A lot of people have expressed an interest in visiting Karen and I know she will love to see you all, but don’t visit just yet in case she hasn’t been moved to Ward 3. I will post further details ASAP and I expect we will put in place some system to ensure that too many visitors don’t show up at the same time.

Another great day Karen. Some Tears, Some Laughter. But another strong step in the right direction.

dp
(Proud as ever)

When I posted Tuesday’s blog, I omitted a couple of important things, so I am adding this mini-blog and have amended Tuesday’s blog very slightly. There are 2 blog entries for Tuesday, this one should be read AFTER the first Tuesday entry.

The amendment was the visiting hours. Although they are 11am-1pm, 4pm-9pm. I have changed that to read the afternoon visiting finishes at 8pm to allow kp + close family some private time.

Couple of omissions of note. I’ll do the negatives first so I can end on a positive.

Karen’s eyesight is worse than I first realised (because of the stroke). This became clear today when I showed her a photo of herself on the camera. She put the camera all the way upto her right eye. She did this with the Acorn Antiques program also. It was a little upsetting to see. It is her LEFT side that is affected by the stroke, but her right eye can’t see at all. Apparently, (I checked this with a nurse), this is not unusual as there is some crossover in the optic nerves. I confirmed this by blocking each of Karen’s eyes and asking what she could see. She could see nothing when her left eye was blocked.

On the positive side, she CAN still make out things at a distance and closeup (presumably with her good eye). I can stand in the hallway (quite a distance from her bed) and wave when I arrive and she sees me fine and knows its me.

Another bit of a negative is that Karen struggles to remember the nurses names. This in itself is not unusual as there are so many on ICU, but what is a bit more disconcerting is the names she remembers them by. Karen loves having her hair done by a certain nurse, but Karen remembers her as “Split” or “Planet” and she really thinks this is her name. (No doubt these names will soon catch on with the rich and famous, I can see “Split Beckham” and “Planet Cruise” for their next offspring).

One of her nurses for the day had been Wendy, Andrea + another name I have forgot. So, the nurse has been calling kp “Tinkerbell” until she gets it right. She is still “Tinkerbell”

Finally, a lovely positive to end on.

If you have read the blog in the right order, you will know about the Acorn Antiques aspects of the day.

I showed Karen one part of the program that really made me laugh and I knew would get her going. Now its only funny if you know the character Mrs Overall played by Julie Walters. It is a page that is selling the old Acorn Antiques clips on DVD.

Well, I showed this to Karen and I read out the line above (in a poor Mrs O. impersonation), but kp produced the biggest of grins and grabbed her stomach for a little belly laugh.

The day with the Disco Dancing

When I arrived at the hospital today, Karen was extremely perky and very awake. She greeted me in true kp fashion.

kp:- “Good Morning. I have been disco dancing.”

The cd was playing by kp’s bedside and it was playing disco songs from the ’70s.

kp:- “We have been dancing”.

Apparently, the nurses had been making kp laugh by dancing to the 70′s music. kp had been doing the movements with her right hand and moving both her feet in time to the music.

She had a new trick up her sleeve that she was very keen to share with me.

kp (to the physio) :- “Tell David what I can do”
Physio :- “Karen can lift her left leg up.”

Sure enough with the physio guiding kp’s left leg (stroke side), she was making all the effort and the leg was rising under kp’s control.

It was amazing to see a previously dead weight of a leg once again under kp’s control albeit with very limited movement.

Karen has a very bad wound on the back of her head and a couple of scars on the sides. But the wound of the back of the head has required that the nurses cut away a lot of Karen’s hair at the back so that the dressing can protect the wound without coming loose. One of the nurses who Karen refers to as the gaffer, has arranged for kp to have a haircut tomorrow by one of the auxiliaries who is also a qualified hairdresser. kp is REALLY looking forward to that.

The Knickers Fiasco !

Karen had asked me to bring in some of her cotton knickers. Well, I thought all knickers were cotton so picked up a couple of pairs and brought them in. They weren’t cotton, they were probably wool or something ! But the Queen wasn’t happy. So Marie said she would buy her some new all-cotton knickers. So in comes Marie this morning with a 6-pack of knickers. They were all cotton all right !!!! They were also all thong !!! Marie, in her keenness to ensure all cotton had mistakenly got thongs. Not really hospital wear !

kp was amused !! Maybe we’ll crack the knickers situation tomorrow.

As per usual, I read out everyone’s comments from the blog and kp is very grateful for all the comments and texts she receives and specifically asked me to thank everyone. She was particularly amused by Mark’s comments equating Karen’s hard resolve to the hardness of the veggy sausages she cooked for him. If Karen’s resolve is half as hard as those sausages, she will be out of hospital next week !

The move to Ward 3 may happen tomorrow (thursday) – slim chance but possible. Karen is not looking forward to this and is quite anxious about being moved, what with all the new faces and the reduced level of nursing (1 nurse to 12 patients instead of 1 to 1 in ICU).

Marie and Michelle visited this afternoon and all 3 sisters enjoyed a boogie to 70′s music. I managed to get a bit of phone video footage of kp’s boogie action. And yes, that is Karen singing in the background. I used the word “singing” very loosely.

Try this 1st
Try this 2nd
Try this 3rd
Try this 4th
Thanks to Nigel for hosting this segment of video. One of these links should work on your machine. Try from the top down. They are all the same video clip.

kp really enjoyed the light relief.

She then asked for “Over the Rainbow” to be played (the Eva Cassidy version). I had a copy on my phone and played it to her, and within 30 seconds, she was in tears. It’s a beautiful rendition of Over the Rainbow and kp knows I want it played at my funeral. Once kp started, the tears spread, Marie, then Michelle, and I was on tissue duty.

That reminds me that I had kp crying again earlier before Michelle and Marie arrived. I asked kp if she wanted me to read out the blog entry from yesterday (the blog itself). I have done this before and kp cried and I am annoyed that I did it again even though kp said to read it out. We got half way and then it was time for tears and hugs. I will not do it again until she is well down the rehab road.

I do really enjoy some private time with kp. And the close family that can visit at the moment are very understanding of this. Thanks.

We even had some tears from one of the lovely nurses (Dawn) who started crying when she was reading the blog on the computer on the ward. She kindly said that the blog had given her a better understanding of the patient’s and relative’s view of ICU.

I rang kp a few minutes ago to wish her “Good Night”. She was upset because today is Lee’s birthday. Lee was kp’s nephew and he died of leukaemia a couple of years ago (aged 18). Kp ALWAYS visits lee’s gravestone to lay some flowers, but today she couldn’t. I know Marie (Lee’s mam) understands, but kp was understandably upset that Lee wasn’t here and that she couldn’t do her bit.

Let’s end on some highs.

Kp did some more “hold the belly” laughing today. We have some good friends who have a daughter called Megan who is very bright for her age. She is about 2 or 3 (sorry Mark/Tracy). But Mark and Tracy do this little game with her where they say a word such as “Fandooblydom”, and ask Megan what it means. Megan replies “It doesn’t mean anything”, but she says it in such a lovely way that kp and I have always found it very funny.

Well, something came up today (forgot what), and the phrase “it doesn’t mean anything” was a pertinent answer which kp gave in the style of Megan. We laughed, kp laughed holding her stomach.

Another good bit of news!

The consultant Catherine instructed the nurses to switch off all Karen’s monitors, as it was felt she didn’t need to be monitored any more. Yipppeeee ! Vicky made a bit of a ceremony of it, but unfortunately only I could see the symbolism as they are behind kp. But thanks Vicky. It is another step in the right direction.

Karen’s eyesight has deteriorated quite a bit as I mentioned earlier, but she has made up for it tenfold in the hearing department. So, a warning to visitors. If you whisper, it will be heard. Kp can hear a pin drop in the next ward.

Marie has agreed to coordinate visiting. And I know Karen is keen to see as many people who can visit as possible. So, we are going to divide up visiting times into hour slots in the next few days, and people can ring Marie (phone number to be provided over the next day or so) to arrange a time to visit so she is not overtaxed by 10 people by her bed. We will post more details when we know she is on the Stroke Ward (Ward 3).

Thanks again for reading and the messages of support. They really do touch Karen. I don’t know if I have said this before, but she really doesn’t understand why so many people have supported her with texts and blog comments.

She’s a star.

dp

Just had a heart breaking call from kp.

She is in a lot of discomfort and is totally fed up and “wants it all to end”.

She can’t get to sleep, she can’t get comfy and she wants me to sort it all out. I spoke to the nurse and one of the doctors to see if anything else can be done to ease her discomfort.

But she has had the maximum pain relief, the maximum sleeping tablet dosage, they have moved her on every side they can move her and she is still uncomfortable and fed up.

I feel so sorry for her.

One of the doctors assured me that within 90mins the latest tablets should kick in and she should be ok. I reassured her that this was the case, and I think she believed me.

The only other option is sedation, and the more severe pain relief, but this would only slow down her recovery. Battling on is the only real solution.

They are wonderful at ICU and I have no doubt they are doing all they can. I left the phonecall feeling that kp was reassured that it would be ok within an hour or so.

Battle on love. You’re doing so well.

c u 2morrow

dp
xxxxx

This blog will not appear until late tonight or early a.m. as kp wants me back at the hospital to show her how to work the TV/Phone in her new private room on Ward 3.

The Day with the Awful Ending

I was gonna call today “The Day of Extremes”, and although that name still applies, recent events require a new name.

Great Start to the day. I entered the ward to see Karen smiling sat upright in a chair. Wahey ! Within 10 minutes, Karen wanted OUT of the chair. She was very uncomfortable. I suppose it must be very strange to be sat in a chair after a month lying on a bed. The nurses wanted to keep her in for a number of good reasons (lungs, strengthening muscles etc…) but kp was not having any of it and made herself very clear.

kp:- I WANT to get back into bed.
nurse:- Fine. Bed it is.

kp got her own way and the nurses set about the big task of moving her from a chair to the bed (takes 3 nurses).

kp is starting to get concerned about her eyesight. When we pass her something to look at, she puts it right upto her right eye, so close it is almost touching. It’s disconcerting and saddening. One of the nurses did some tests to confirm the extent of the problem, but we won’t hear any more on this until the Stroke specialists have done a more in-depth study. Apparently, it is not unusual for this to occur and then patients get back full vision in the course of time.

After a snooze on the bed, kp wanted to go back in the chair so we could take her for a coffee outside. The nurses did their thing to get kp in the chair, but unfortunately there weren’t enough nurses free to take Karen for the coffee, so she had to wait in the chair for quite a while. She started getting frustrated. Tut here, Tut tut there, here a tut, there a tut, everywhere a tut tut.

The ICU ward was completely bare of any patients apart from Karen, so we put the ghetto blaster on with disco fever playing. kp started dancing (with her right hand), and asked me to dance. kp knows only too well that I am no John Travolta. But, for the sake of amusing the Queen, I strutted my funky stuff. kp had a good belly laugh, and then asked for a repeat performance when Jane returned from a breath of fresh air, so she could enjoy the pleasures of dance (dp style). What fun we had ;-|

After “Come Dancing”, kp ordered me to Ward 3 to check out her new quarters. I was able to return with a positive report, namely kp had her own private room and that she was moving today or should that be

Just before we went for a coffee, one of the consultants and another member of staff asked to seem me privately.

Consultant :- It’s nothing negative Karen, I am sure David will tell you what its about.

?!?!?!?!

We ended up discussing it in front of karen. It was to do with this blog. It had come to their attention and although they appreciated the good light it showed their department in, they requested that we not mention nurses by name, and not include photos without express permission of the nurses. They were exceedingly nice about it – A totally legitimate request after all. So, sorry to any nurse that didn’t want their photo on the blog. I have removed all offending photos. Let me know if I have missed any. I have also tried to go through the blog and remove name references, but there is a chance I have missed 1 or 2, so please contact me if I have missed one out. I won’t be at all offended and it will be removed.

By the time this chat was over, it was tea/coffee time with kp outside. Yay !! This time, because she was in the chair, we could get her into a courtyard area outside one of the cafes.

kp was in top form and enjoyed her cup of tea.

No sooner were we back at the ICU ward than it was time for kp to move to her new Ward.

We gave the ward a card of thanks and some choccies.

Karen signed the card.

On arrival, Judith (one of her work colleagues was visiting) and had dropped off a film kp’s colleagues had done for her. I had a quick preview tonight and it looks very funny. I will put it on the laptop so kp can see it on a bigger screen. Thanks Judith.

We moved her down, got her settled, sorted visiting hours out but within a short period of time, it became very obvious how much difference one-to-one nursing (ICU) is to one nurse to 12 patients nursing.

When we needed some nurses to move kp to a comfortable position, it was hard to muster support. She hasn’t had her usual bedbath before she goes to sleep and it is a very big culture shock for Karen. For all of us in fact. Karen hasn’t got the strength to move herself. She can’t cut her food up (only 1 arm working). She needs assistance for frankly everything. And the poor nurses there have another 11 patients to deal with each. The next few days are going to be very interesting indeed and this was highlighted tonight.

When we left Karen, she had been moved into a comfy position and had fallen asleep. Within an hour of going home, she was on the phone to Marie and myself in tears. She couldn’t work the phone, the tv and she desperately wanted me to go to the hospital to help her.

Of course, I went straight away and I was faced with the saddest of pictures when I entered her room. I am in tears now recalling it. She wasn’t crying. She wasn’t upset. She was watching TV intently. I watched for a few seconds before entering. I said “hiya love, what you watching”. She said “not sure”. So I looked and she was watching a static picture on the tv saying “Do not use your mobile phones in the hospital”. No sound, no movement. So very sad.

I just hugged her. She was an empty shell.

We got to talking and she said she had to get out of there. I explained as best I could that until her pelvis is healed she needed to be in the hospital.

kp: You need to think “Out of the box”. Phone your dad. He’s good at thinking out of the box. But I can’t stay here.

In the background was the wailing of an old woman crying for help. The stroke ward is mostly full of the older generation.

I was holding back the tears desperately. If I could take Karen home, I could look after her. No, I couldn’t, I need an X-ray machine, drugs etc etc…I also need another person to help me move her. My thoughts were racing.

I couldn’t think of a solution. She was due her sleeping tablets but kp spotted they were going to give her the wrong ones (they hadn’t worked for kp a couple of nights before). I had to ring ICU to find out the right ones.

This was awful. AWFUL !

Poor Karen was in tears. I was so close, and trying to retain some calmness. Karen was saying some pretty negative things (I am not going to elaborate more than that). I was very concerned.
She was uncomfortable and wanted making comfy. I couldn’t find anyone to help in the first 5 minutes. I buzzed the buzzer and a nurse came and told us that we were just one of 25 patients that needed attention and that they would get to us eventually.

I tried in vain, on my own to get kp comfy. She doesn’t know what makes her comfy, so she can’t instruct. She can only say when she is comfy. I couldn’t find the position. She was sure she wanted to be on her right hand side.

Within 15 minutes (but it felt a lot longer), 2 lovely nurses came in and sorted her out. I had the position perfect but they had her on her opposite side. I’ll know for next time. Within 1 minute of her getting comfy (no exaggeration) the sleeping tablets had kicked in and she was out for the count. I tried to tell her “Good Night”, but there was no rousing her.

She is going to wake up in the night and be frightened unable to call anyone because she won’t be able to find the buzzer I positioned right by her. She can’t use the phone because she can’t see the numbers to dial and struggles to get it off the receiver.

I feel awful, so sad, and within 1 metre of the ward door I was in tears. By the time I got to the car, I must have looked like a beetroot.

I am knackered ! I have eaten anything today apart from a pasty (thanks Marie).

I have called a family conference for tomorrow. The only way forward I can see is for the family to pull together to cover Karen’s waking moments with company and to be her oddjob person.

I phoned Jane and Marie on the way home and both were very supportive and came up with some good arguments for kp’s behaviour.

Let’s see what tomorrow brings…………….

I suppose it can’t be any worse. Or am I being naive ?

dp

I will post information about visiting kp tomorrow night after the family conference.
I know some of you asked about sending flowers but the ICU ward couldn’t have flowers in for infection reasons. Flowers are now ok and may boost kp’s morale. The address is

Karen Pollard
c/o Ward 3,
Queen Elizabeth Hospital
Queen Elizabeth Avenue
Sheriff Hill
Gateshead
NE9 6SX

The day after the awful day

Well, its 4pm and I have come home to sort the dogs out. Marie is staying on until I go back about 6pm.

I was hoping today couldn’t be any worse than yesterday and my hopes were realised. kp was feeling more positive today.

Last Night carried on being a negative experience for kp. She needed attending to in the night and couldn’t find the buzzer. She said she had been calling out for help but noone had been forthcoming.

Last Night, Marie asked Yvonne if she could get in for 8am, which she did. It sounds like Yvonne had been quite firm with Karen and not given in to the emotional blackmail that other family members (myself primarily) are so prone to. Karen responded well to this approach. I may take a bottle of brandy in and try to be firm myself

I had told her that we were going to have a family conference and as soon as we were all present, kp pressed the issue and got the conference underway. Present were the 5 sisters (Karen, Marie, Michelle, Yvonne and Jane (the new adopted sister)). We now have a plan of attack which kp is happy with.

Cover is as follows
8am – 11am. Jane.
11am – 1pm – dp
1pm – 6pm – Marie
6pm – 8pm Yvonne
7pm – eyes shut – dp

This should also be good for us, so we don’t get too exhausted for what will undoubtedly be a long haul.

Big thanks to all the sisters who have offered help. And to the “Pretend Friends” !!

The Video
Karen’s work colleagues had put together a sketch to cheer her up. I put it on my laptop so I could show it to her on a bigger screen than the camcorder. Marie brought in a big flat magnifying glass and we all gathered round the laptop. kp was very eager to see it and thoroughly enjoyed it – big smiles appeared on her face. I don’t think she could see the detail of it, but she knew the voices and spotted the odd person when her eyes focussed correctly. I feel sure it will get quite a few replays and will provide many more laughs. Thanks VERY much to kp’s team for this. Little advice for all of you involved. DO NOT QUIT the National Blood Service. You will not be getting acting careers ! If it had been professional actors it wouldn’t have been half as much fun ! Hope noone is offended by that. I’ll find out next time I give blood

MRSA
Karen has MRSA again in her head wound. Her head wound incidentally is pretty horrific. I have seen it undressed and you get the impression if you put your finger in it, you could touch the brain. I have resisted the temptation so far.

So it was barrier nursing today. Gowns and Gloves.

Abbie’s Visit
Abbie, (Karen’s niece’s daughter), visited today. She enjoyed dressing up as a doctor (she is and sneaking up on Karen. Karen was very pleased to see her. I think Abbie may have been a bit surprised at seeing Karen in a hospital bed not looking her usual million dollars. But she braved it well.

So, all in all, a lot more of a positive day. I am feeling a lot better because Karen is. I just hope she gets a good night’s sleep tonight, but I will do another shorted blog entry before bed to report on her evening.

Visiting
If you would like to visit Karen, then we would welcome the visitors and it would keep Karen mentally stimulated. Visiting Hours are 11am – 1pm, 4pm – 8pm. We’ll break the visiting into 1 hour slots, so if you would like to visit, please ring Marie on either 01642-284812 or 07961-346149. You may have to leave a message as Marie is at the hospital a lot and won’t be able to ring back until she is out of the hospital. Please leave your name, phone number and preferred date/time for visiting. Marie will get back to you to confirm its ok.

Thanks !!

Until later…

dp

Went back to the hospital at 6.30pm to relieve Marie who had given kp a good wash and scrubdown.

A consultant had been in and told kp that it may take as long as Xmas to get kp walking properly again. I don’t think Karen was overly concerned at that, her main objective at the moment is to get out of this “godforsaken hellhole” (her words)

They have given her anti-depressants, which is definately a good move.

He is also arranging for a visit from an eye specialist who will try and assess why her right eyes isn’t working properly. Some suggestions he came up with are :-

• Eyes get lazy when people are sedated for long periods. Fixes itself
• Detached Retina. May be fixable
• Stroke related. Could fix itself.

Practical Measures
Today, we started to think of practical measures like money. Tony (Jane’s husband) is very kindly going to look into the compensation side of things. For now, we are ok, but in a few months, things will be tricky. Generally, I am a very material person, but I have learned a big lesson from this accident, and that is, the material things count for nothing. The ones you love come top of the list. I don’t really care if we have to liquidise assets to keep things going. The only thing that matters to me is Karen.

Getting Comfy
Karen has GREAT difficulty in getting into a comfy position. 8 out of 10 minutes are spent readjusting various limbs to try and get Karen comfortable. We are now dab hands at moving kp’s body parts without causing pain, but the trickier bit is finding the elusive comfy position. If you ask Karen, how do you want to be (position wise), her reply is ALWAYS “I don’t know !!!!” (various volume levels dependant on how many times you have asked the question).

dp:- Do you want to be on your left side or your right side ?
kp:- I don’t know.

dp:- Let’s do the left side
kp:- Fine !

dp:- Do you want your leg further up.
kp:- I DON’T KNOW !

You get the idea.

So as carers, we have to know what she doesn’t know herself. It’s like a puzzle with the answer sheet missing. So you try various combinations until you hear :-

kp:- I think that’s ok.

2 minutes later, she will be uncomfortable.

And the cycle continues……

Tonight Marie and I were sniggering to each other. After being particularly demanding, Karen came out with :-

kp:- “You’re lucky I am so patient”

Marie left the room where she could develop the snigger into something a bit more laughlike.

We take it on the chin. It’s not so bad when there’s 2 of you. It doesn’t feel as personal.

Mrs 26 beds
Last night, a nurse was very keen to point out how many beds were on the ward and she would get to us in turn. I had asked for Karen to be made comfy I expect. Now fair play to the nurses on the ward, there are only 2 on for 26 patients.

But tonight Mrs 26 beds was at it again. I asked the simple question :-

kp:- “Could you give us some idea what time the tablets were likely to come round, so Karen could know when she could go to sleep ?”
Unnamed Nurse :- “We have 26 beds and only 1 nurse who can give the tablets out”

Well, I had to bite my tongue. If she does it again, I am going to ask for a recount.

New Bed
Karen is on a better bed tonight. It’s a gel-based one that is better for her bruising and wounds.

Can you just….?
We were warned that kp would use emotional blackmail to get family members to do various things for her. Yvonne had a great approach today and she got away with it. She stood no nonsense and kp responded to it. But at the same time, kp needs to be able to vent her frustrations and I think it is going to be Marie and I who cop it.

Tonight I got a very small dose.

It was hometime for me (10.20pm). kp had been given her sleeping tablets. She was talking rubbish (a sure sign that she is knackered). When I told her I was leaving and would be back at 8am, she said “Can you just reposition my legs ?”, “Can you just fill my water up ?”, “Can you watch Big Brother with me ?”, “Can you…….”

I was firm, stood my ground and told her I needed to go home for the dogs and that I would be back first thing in the morning. I know for a fact that as long as I am there, she won’t go to sleep if she can help it. With no visitors, she will.

I left her calm, serene, tired and probably snoring by now !

Have a good sleep kp. See you soon…

dp
xxxxx

The day we realised kp is not getting the right treatment
All credit to Marie who has been meticulously writing down events that have led us to the conclusion that Karen is not being well looked after at Ward 3.

I have already written about Mrs 26 Beds. Some of the things that Ward 3 have not been doing for Karen are as follows :-

• Moving her on 2 hourly intervals as instructed by the consultant.
• Cleaning up promptly after Karen has had a bowel movement.
• Responding to Karen’s cries for attention
• Emptying kp’s urine collection unit which overflows. (This has happened twice)
• Responding in a timely fashion to requests for help (from relatives). 40 minutes on one occasion.
• Providing a chair bed so we can get Karen sitting up (to help lungs and sores)
• Following barrier care procedures (Mrs 26 beds)

There are others but you get the idea.

The crunch of it (for me) was when she told Marie today “I am a burden to the staff here”. Everything became clear. She is spot on. A patient should NOT feel they are a burden. That ISN’T going to aid recovery !!

We are trying to fix the issue by stepping in ourselves to help, which is the right thing to do in the short term, but we need her to receive adequate care from the staff, which she is not receiving.

I am not picking on the staff personally here. The staff care when she gets it is great, but there isn’t enough of it. The exception to this is Mrs 26 beds who needs some lessons in “Customer Care”. There is a right and a wrong way to tell someone that you will be there shortly. You don’t tell them how insignificant they are. Karen is NOT insignificant.

Weeping Wounds
Marie spotted that one of Karen’s wounds on her rear was weeping quite significantly. She called someone to have a look at it. They were shocked at what they saw and had to go and get someone else to look. That person was also shocked by what they saw and had never seen anything like it before. More confirmation that she is in the wrong place.

Visitors
Today was the first day Karen had had different visitors. It was great to see her interacting with normal people Today, her first visitor was Deborah (from work). Lots of smiles from kp. Deborah was great for kp as she could catch up on work gossip. She also really knows her nursing stuff. I learned quite a lot on how to move kp around and make things easier when turning her etc… Thanks Debs.

Then it was Karen’s relatives, Lillian and Bernard who again lit the smile touchpaper.

Whilst Lilly and Bernard were there, we then had more problems finding available nurses for things that needed doing.

kp eating too little
Karen is not really eating enough in the families opinion. She can manage 1/4 or 1/2 platefuls at best. Today we may have seen the results of this. She was knackered pretty much all day.
We have tried to encourage kp to eat more, but you can’t force the food down. We will address this tomorrow.

Other than that, it’s been a quieter day. Thanks for all the texts and blog comments. They never fail to bring a smile to kp, whose first or second question in the mornings is, are there any blog comments ?

dp

Today has been an exhausting day for me personally. The back of my throat is really sore and swollen. A 6am awakening from the dogs this morning after a bad night’s sleep wasn’t the best start to the day. Couple that with our oven has packed in so hot food is a bit tricky. Sod’s law that it will pack in on the first day of a Bank Holiday Weekend when you can’t get anyone out for love nor money. I also decided to cut the grass (1.5 hours) as it was the first sunny day for weeks, but did so on an empty stomach. So, come 11pm tonight after leaving kp asleep, I was ready to hit the sack and knew I would go out like a light. I was in bed and had just switched the TV off, when………………..

Phonecall from kp at 11pm.

kp:- “David, I need you to come in.”
dp:- “What’s wrong love ?”
kp:- “I just need you to come in”
dp:- “Is there someone there ?”
kp:- “Yes”

Of course there was someone there. She can’t use the phone without help.

dp:- “I’ll be there in about 30 minutes.”

Something was up, I wasn’t sure what.

When I arrived, kp explained that she couldn’t get comfy at all, the buzzer had broken so she couldn’t call for help, and when she called by shouting, noone came. She was really fed up.

I was sceptical about the buzzer being broken, so I spoke to a nurse who confirmed it was and that an engineer was coming out. I even tested it myself. It was well and truly broke. An engineer did indeed come out and replaced it.

Karen was absolutely exhausted and dying to sleep. But she really couldn’t get comfy. The next 4 hours consisted of the following routine repeated every 5-10 minutes.

The routine
kp:- “David, I need moving”
dp:- “Which side love ?”
kp:- “I don’t KNOW”

1. Blanket Off
2. Sheets Off
3. Remove Back Support Blanket
4. Remove Leg Pillow (used for cushioning)
5. Lay Bed Flat
6. Check catheter tube won’t be blocked by intended move.
7. Move kp to correct pre-move place on bed (hard work on own) (if she is being moved onto left side, she needs to be as far right on the bed as possible)
8. Roll up Blanket ready to prop kp up
9. Position in safe reachable place so it doesn’t fall off during move.
10. Put Karen’s left arm (dead one) on her stomach and ask her to hold it
11. Place Pillow between legs at correct angle so it supports kp’s top leg after the move.
12. Do the move itself, which involves supporting kp’s whole back and bum with 2 arms.
13. dp:- “3-2-1″
14. The Move
15. kp:- “Ow, Ow, Ow, Ow”"
16. Position Back Support Blanket in back so she doesn’t roll flat on back.
17. Position Legs in cocked position so they are comfy.
18. Replace Sheets
19. Replace Top Blanket
20. “Is that ok ?”
21. “Yes”

At this point, I would go back to trying to get some sleep, which isn’t easy with 2 chairs, very little space and to compound this routine, it was barrier care still, so I was wearing a plastic pinny and latex gloves which make your hands sweat like hell. Well, they didn’t last long. After about 10 of these routines, I was telling MRSA to “Come and have a go, if you think you’re hard enough”. (No gloves, no pinny).

I dozed a couple of times, but it wasn’t sleep.

If I was getting frustrated, kp must have been going bonkers, yet she remained calm throughout. She didn’t raise her voice once. I better repeat that. She didn’t raise her voice once.

There was just no getting kp comfy. kp said I should get the nurses to try. So, 3 female nurses came in and did the routine. 5 minutes later, I was sent for a specific named nurse who had the knack of getting her comfy. He tried. 5 minutes later, I was instructed to recall the named nurse and tell him “one last try”, kp had an idea.

No Joy !

So, it was back to me to keep trying. I was so so tired. The turning routine which probably takes about 2-3 mins if you’re on form was starting to take longer and longer. I couldn’t remember what to do next. I would stand by the bed and look at what I had done and try and recall what the next step was. The longer it takes the more uncomfortable it is for Karen. But again she didn’t complain. We did get lots of “Ow”s. But never did she raise her voice. When I was getting to my most frustrated later on, I wanted to say “Look, you can’t get comfortable, go to sleep uncomfortable”, but instead I said “I love you” and gave her a kiss. I think kp secretly thinks I was saying the former at times as she thanked me a few times on the night for being there.

By about 3am, it was clear that moves weren’t working. kp was sick of being moved and uncomfortable and just wanted a sleeping tablet to put her out of it. I spoke to the nurse who said the only thing that would knock her out was “Tramazopal” (something like that), but that if she took it at this time, she would be asleep all day. kp said she still wanted it, so he checked with the Doctor, who reitereated what the nurse said. A few more turns, and 20 minutes later kp was “in agony”.

kp:- “I want some painkillers”

I got some painkillers from the nurse and 2 moves later at 4am, kp was sleeping like a baby. GOAL !!!!

I rang Marie and asked her to come in for 8am (I was on that shift) went home, hit the sack, and slept.

Hope she is feeling more settled today.

The day of the complaint
Marie was on early shift today and she took the opportunity to lodge an informal complaint with the Head Nurse on the Ward about the level of Karen’s care.

According to Marie, the Head Nurse concerned was very attentive and sincerely wanted to make things better and assured us he would have words with the main individual. Since this, Marie and I both felt that the care for Karen has definately improved. Let’s hope it is a sustained improvement.

Visit from ICU Outreach Staff
The Intensive Care Unit have a group of nurses who go out onto the wards to follow the Critical Care Patients for a few weeks after they have been in ICU. They visited Karen today, and it was Karen’s opportunity (with Marie assisting) to explain how poor her care had been at Ward 3. At times, she got upset during the conversation. They will take this back to the ICU ward so we may see some results from that.

General Health
kp was still lethargic today and hasn’t eaten as well as she could have. When we try and encourage her to eat, she reasserts that she isn’t a 5 year old. I won’t be pushing on this front again and may need to speak to a doctor/nurse to get them to have a word.

One of Karen’s wounds on the bottom of her back is weeping badly. It needed to be redressed twice today. This will not have been helped by the lack of turns she has been given. A new bed is on order for kp which will help alleviate bed sores, by changing pressure points every so often. She had one of these in ICU and it worked very well.

Visitors
Kevin visited today. He is the driver of the car that Karen was in. Karen was very pleased to see Kevin and vice-versa from what Marie told me. He will be off work for a few more months as his collarbone and ribs fix themselves. Kevin has some photos of the cars involved in the crash. Hopefully on his next visit, he will bring these and if I can I will post them on the blogsite.

Jane and Guy (my sister and brother-in-law) visited also. Karen really enjoyed their company and they brought with them a video of their 3 year old daughter (my niece) saying “Hello Karen. Hope you get well soon. I love you.” It was a bit prompted but this made it all the more funny and good to watch. We got a few smiles from kp out of that.

Karen then wanted to call her great-niece and nephew, which she promptly did. They were thrilled to hear from her.

Loves from Michelle
Karen was in need of a few hugs today. She didn’t particularly get upset but just wanted hugs. Karen doesn’t do hugs as a rule, and she is very choosy who she hugs, and Michelle was the chosen one today.

Not really much else to say today. The big fear for Karen and myself was that she would have another night like last night. To preempt this, Karen was put on a stronger sleeping tablet (Diazopam). I reassured her that this should do the trick and there was no need to be frightened etc….I stayed until she fell asleep and for a bit after. She was very asleep when I left, so, fingers crossed, she will get a really good night’s sleep.

Request for Visitors
Today was a good day overall and one of the reasons for this was a different set of visitors. So, if you would like to visit Karen, please contact Marie on 01642-284812 or 07961-346149 to arrange a time. We would love to see you. If Marie doesn’t answer, leave a message saying who you are, what time etc….

Boggett
Whilst I was trying to get Karen off to sleep tonight, she asked me to talk to her about nice things. I did the dogs, the garden, holidays. She started to get very sleepy and became quieter in voice and asked for me to tell her some more nice things. So I came up with some more. She became even more asleep. One of the last things she asked for was

kp:- Tell me some things about the Boggett.

She meant the blog !

Soon after, she was VERY asleep and didn’t stir whilst I made a racket arranging her buzzer, water etc…

Sleep well my love

dp
xxxxx

The day where the stitches got removed

Last Night
I am pleased to be able to report that Karen had a much better night. She was much more settled generally and the Diazopam must have been the icing on the cake as well. She did, however, ring Marie at 1.30am to say she had had a bad dream about me. But it didn’t seem to phase her too much.

When I arrived, she was very excited to tell me something. When you visit Karen, you have to put a gown and gloves on and Karen always knows I drop my bag in the room first before gowning.

kp:- Morning, I have something exciting to tell you
dp:- Fantastic, don’t tell me yet, wait until I have my gown on.

Marie and Karen tittered. Karen had bet Marie that I wouldn’t want to hear the news until I had gowned and entered properly. It’s great to be so predictable !

The news was that kp was having all her stitches and staples out today (apart from the trachy ones).

Stitches Out
I watched intently as the nurse took them out. She has about 12-14 stitches from the top of her chestbone down to and below her belly button and about 40 staples across her waistline.

I got a bit bored watching, so asked if I could do it. To my surprise the nurse said “Yes”. Wahey !! Call me Nurse David in future. I only removed about a quarter of Karen’s staples but it was great. When I asked if I could put some staples across Karen’s lips, she said “no”. You can’t have everything I suppose !

Improvement in Care
Today has seen a further increase in the level of Karen’s care. Big thanks to Marie for catching the Head Honcho and speaking to him.

General Health
Karen has been in good form today. She is not eating as much as she should still, but I will read Margo’s comments out to her, maybe that will do the trick !

Further update later…..

Not much to report from the evening shift.

Lydia visited today (as you can see from her blog entry). She had Karen doing belly laughs (where kp holds her belly to stop it splitting). Karen really enjoys seeing friends from work or home as it really helps to break the monotony of a day in bed. Thanks for coming Lydia.

After Lydia, Yvonne and Dave left for the evening, kp and I had a nice bit of private time. Lots of hugs and kisses. And very little talking, because we have said it all. She did ask me to tell her about the worst bits of her last 33 days, but from previous experience I have learned my lesson, and said you can read it for yourself when you’re better. I do hope her eyesight returns.

I had told Karen this morning that when I came back on the evening, I would fit the Continuous Passive Movement (CPM) machine to her legs so that they do physio while we talk. She managed 15 minutes on the right leg, 30 minutes on the left. Thanks to Yvonne and Lydia who helped me get the machine on her legs. Heavy Machine, Heavy Legs and lots of pain if you don’t get the legs just right.

When it came to hometime, kp wanted me to stay the night. She said the dogs will be fine. I am quite tired generally at the moment and need good nights sleep and basically said so. I think she understands. She said she did with a bit of a tut at the end.

That reminds me, the last time I stayed the night (until 4am), kp had the worst of nights. She couldn’t get comfy. I was kn+ckered. I longed for a bed to put my head down. Well, there was a bed there with kp in it and because she was on her side, there was JUST enough room for me to lie beside her. So, I got on the hospital bed with kp. Actually it worked out well because my front was supporting her back. Unfortunately in order for me not to fall out of this SINGLE hospital bed, I would need to put the sideguards up (on my side). So I did.

Oops !!! The button for lowering the sideguard is quite a stretch and is not really intended to be pushed by the person in the bed. So I was kind of stuck in the bed with Karen. Within minutes she was uncomfy and wanted me out. At the same time, I could hear someone outside heading this way. I felt an imminent bollocking from a nurse. Luckily, I managed to push the button and lower the sideguard and swing my feet out before he came in. So he probably thought I was just sitting on the bed.

I would have slept like a log had kp been comfy.

That’s all for now….

Hopefully tomorrow should be an interesting day as kp is getting a newer better bed plus a posh chair that goes from horizontal (like a bed) (so she can get on it) to chair sitting position, the consultants will be doing their rounds, and the physios will be coming round also.

ttfn

dp

Awful Night
When I arrived at 8am this morning, Karen was fast asleep. This could mean 2 things. She had either had a cracking night sleep or an awful night sleep.

It was the latter.

She had been in agony overnight and in tears. The nurses were great and responded promptly to her buzzes. They discussed pain relief and Morphine was even mentioned as a possibility, but thankfully, they opted for Metadopperlopperforzymylinepopper (or something like that) which she is taking every 4 hours. We will see today if it does the trick. They have arranged a visit from the Pain Relief Nurse Specialist tomorrow to discuss suitable pain relief systems.

Oooooohhhh Matron
About 9am, the Matron and the Stroke Nurse came in to discuss the issues we had had over the weekend. They listened as I went through all the issues and then kp piped up that things were ok now and if things carry on as they were, there was no longer an issue.

Knackered dp
I was knackered for the visit today. Had slept through my 6am alarm. And today Karen asked if she asked me to stay the night would that be ok ? I said I would stay the night if at all possible but that I also need my rest. I explained that I was exhausted and that I need to be strong to be able to look after her on a night and not in my current state. I think she understood.

Physios
The physios came round today and did some exercises on Karen’s limbs. She has quite restricted movement of her left arm and hand (stroke side) and her right leg. Karen found the exercises painful, but this pain is necessary to stop the limbs ceasing up.

Some Laughs
Later in the morning, we enjoyed a few good laughs.

I have started recording (on my phone) key events of the day, because I have an awful memory. I speak into the phone and it records what I am saying.

After speaking something into the phone, Karen said :-

kp:- Alan Partridge

I laughed as did kp. (If you don’t know Alan Partridge, that won’t be funny to you)

Another laugh we had was when the physios were doing their thing. One of the physios was exercising her left arm and holding it skyward in the air.

kp:- “To infinity and beyond”

Lol !

Finally, I was explaining how bad the traffic was this morning, and how big the queues were. I mentioned that it would have took me a lot longer if I wasn’t on the motorbike.

kp:- Did you get your knee down ?

Well, this was so out of the blue, it floored me and I was giggling for ages.

Love you kp. See you in a few hours.

dp
xxxxx

PS – Here is a photo with Karen in her new head attire which aims to keep her bandage on the back of her head in place until they can shave her head later today.

Wee Willy Winky !

Not too much to report from the evening shift. Marie had done the day shift and she caught the consultants visit. She reported that kp may need an operation on her head to clean up the head wound. It does look awful.

Changing Rooms
Karen has changed rooms today. She is now in a larger private room. The other one was a little hard to navigate round. This one is much more roomy. Marie had the unenviable task of doing the move and had to move 60+ “Get Well” cards from the wall in the old room to the new. Shame I missed that job. Marie, you didn’t get them as straight as I had them in the old room.

When I arrived for the evening shift, Marie was like a woman possessed. She had been reborn as a cross between Hitler and Mother Theresa. I have never heard so many orders issued to me in such a short space of time, all in the best interests of kp, so I didn’t mind !

Visitors
My mum and dad visited this evening. Karen was not really in the mood for company today, and it was Mum and Dad that were the unlucky visitors. They thought she looked great compared to a week ago, but I could tell she wasn’t her usual chirpy self.

Pain Patch
kp has a patch on that lasts 3 days that gives her a constant supply of pain relief. It is much smaller than a nicotine patch and is transparent. It looks like the kind of thing they stick on Oranges. In fact, I think it may well be. They are probably doing it cheap and just hoping for the placebo effect.

Tired Eyes
Karen was very tired tonight and fell asleep constantly. Some days we can’t get her to sleep for hours because we are forever looking for the elusive comfy position. Today, there are a lot more positions that are comfy, and she had no problems sleeping.

When I told her I was going, she said I should stay and talk to her. I told her she was falling asleep all the time. I stayed and talked to her about some topic or other…It went something like this…..

kp:- Can you get me some lipbalm ?
dp gets the lipbalm and puts it on kp’s lips.
dp:- Do you know when you were sedated, I would say “purse your lips” and you would !
kp:- Was…………………..?

Gone !

Fast Asleep !

Cracking Conversation kp, thanks !!!

G’Night

dp

xxxxx

CLICK HERE to go to June’s Chapter

The best day so far

I got a phonecall at 9am from kp.

kp:- Guess where I have been all night ?
dp:- Where ?
kp:- Fast Asleep

Karen had had, for the first time, a good night’s sleep. I think it was a combination of the pain relief patch and an exhausting day yesterday. She said the nurses had told her this morning that every time they checked in on her on the night, she was asleep.

Her good night’s sleep was obvious when I went in at 12.30pm. She was full of life and had just finished a physio session without too much discomfort.

Jane is a 1950′s film star
Jane visited this afternoon and had us all in stitches. Karen was holding her belly like I have never seen before. If she had still had stitches and staples in, they would have surely popped out.

She was doing impressions of 1950′s film stars, with their posh accents, terms like “Scamp and Ginger the dog” and her impression of a war-time tailgunner. Don’t ask.

Cards, Cards & More Cards
Karen has probably 70+ “Get Well” cards on one wall and pictures of family/friends on the other wall. The nurses are forever commenting on how many cards she has. Today it was the turn of some visitors who were passing kp’s room. They went past, did a double-take and came back and said something like “Someone’s popular”. They then went to get other family members to have a look.

Thanks everyone for sending them.

I only stayed a couple of hours and left Marie, Yvonne and Jane looking after kp. As I was left, she was getting all her wounds redressed.

Today, Marie has done the morning shift, Yvonne is doing the afternoon and I am back on the evening shift. Jane is performing her role as transport/entertainment manager.

Thanks all of you !

dp

Not much to report from the evening shift, but Yvonne had an eventful and upsetting time with kp on the afternoon shift. The “special” chair has finally arrived.

Thanks for all the cards by the way !!!

Karen was put in the chair “for an hour”. After an hour she was very uncomfortable and was keen to get back into bed. Yvonne called for assistance to get her back into bed on 3 occasions and it took a farther hour to gather the 5 nurses required to get her from the chair back to the bed. Karen was very upset and in a lot of pain. She has lost confidence in the nurses and will not be going back in the chair unless they can guarantee they will get her back into bed after an hour. Quite Rightly So !!! Let’s see if we can pin them down to this tomorrow.

Visitors

Karen had been keen to see her nephew Chris. She had heard that he visited when she was sedated and critically ill in the rotating bed, but he got upset and had to leave the Intensive Care Unit.

Chris and Karen were pleased to see each other and exchanged kisses and handholds which is not something Karen does very often !!

She looked 100 times better than when Chris last saw her. David (Yvonne’s husband) brought Chris up.

Picture of Chris (left) and Dave (right).
(For all the fellas out there, David isn’t gay and is happily married)

dp+kp
After the family left, kp + I spent some nice private time together, but she was quite tired and wanted to get into a comfy position for sleep. I sorted that and then positioned water and the buzzer for during the night.

And left her to dream…………

dp

PS – Got a bizarre message from my mum when I got home. It went something like this :-

Mum :- Been speaking to a friend who has been reading the blog and she says a man has found a cure for MRSA and it is for sale in ASDA.

This seems surreal, but I feel sure she has not been on the bottle. I will ring you tomorrow Mum ! Thanks to the friend who found this !!!

Final Photo – This is Karen about a week ago in the Intensive Care Unit, dancing (with her hands) to some 70′s music

Marie, Michelle + kp (sisters)

Karen had another good night’s sleep but was very tired and groggy this morning. She didn’t want breakfast and no amount of coaxing would get any food down her. She didn’t want the buildup drink the nurse provided in place of breakfast.

She feels light-headed when we turn her and I really feel she needs to be eating more. I tried persuading her, but you don’t mess with kp when she is well, and you definately don’t argue with her when she looks like a tired Wee Willy Winkie.

Phoned the police for an update. They are going to be questioning the man involved over the next few days.

An uneventful morning.

The fun started to happen as I left at lunchtime. Marie, Jane, Yvonne and Debs arrived and the laughter began. Shame I had to leave, but I have an overdraft with the Bank of Sleep at the moment and need to catch up.

Maybe more to post later when I return on the evening shift and hear all the gossip.

It sounds like Karen didn’t stay awake much after I left and was asleep most of the day.

When I arrived, Ethan (Karen’s Great-Nephew) and Michelle were eating off the hospital eating tables (the ones that slide over the beds). Yvonne was in “Nurse” mode.

When I said “Hi” to Ethan and got a hug, kp opened her eyes briefly, saw me, then fell back to sleep again.

About 10 minutes later, she awoke for a little chat to Ethan, but I could tell it was taking a lot of effort to put on a face for him. She was in pain, despite the Fentanol Patch. I asked kp if she wanted more pain relief and she did, so the nurse gave us 2 Tramadol to give to her.

Ethan (8 years old) was pleased to see Karen and vice versa, but I think he was a bit wary of seeing kp in a hospital bed, very quiet and not her normal self. He was more keen to see my motorbike.

When Michelle, Yvonne, Ethan and Dave (heterosexual taximan) left, kp continued to sleep until her next visitors arrived (relatives Stacey, Marlene and Celia). Stacey is a nurse and she filled us in on good practice and what they should and shouldn’t be doing. kp had a temperature this morning (38`C) and they hadn’t checked the temperature all day, which they should have done if her last reading showed a temperature. They should have also took blood cultures. I am not sure if they did this or not.

Interestingly, Stacey said that the Fentanol Patch is a morphine derivative. So that could explain her grogginess for the past 24/36 hours. kp didn’t have too many smiles for Stacey and Co. but I KNOW this is just down to her current state.

I left shortly after Stacey’s Clan, kp was finding it very hard to stay awake.

One of the last thing’s she said to me were that she hoped she had a better day tomorrow. Me too love, me too……………

There’s a couple of things I forgot to mention about yesterday. I can only remember one of them.

The one I can remember relates to a visit we had from Karen Lax’s husband and daughter. Karen Lax was next to Karen in the Intensive Care Unit. She was a little older than Karen but similar in many ways, very loving husband and family, big Donny Osmond Fan and you might recall both Karen’s were due to see Donny Osmond in concert in September 2005.

We got quite close to the family and enjoyed hearing each other’s progress.

Sadly, Karen Lax died in Intensive Care. Marie arranged for a card to be sent to the family to say how sorry we are that Karen didn’t make it. Today, Karen’s husband and daughter came in to see how Karen was doing, which was so nice of them. Karen’s husband was understandably still upset and this made the visit so much more special. Thank you !!!

They brought with them a card and a Donny Osmond photo that Karen Lax had. This is now on Karen’s wall.

Thank you.

You are all in our thoughts.

Not too much to report today. Marie was on the early and she reported that the consultant, dietician and tissue viability nurse had been in.

The dietician, aware that kp enjoyed soups, had advised that if kp wasn’t eating very much she could have buildup soups. Nutrional soups by Nestle with additional vitamins etc…

The consultant didn’t say much of note.

The tissue viability nurse had advised that kp’s head wound needed redressing and swabbing. Ditto for her groin wounds where the X-Fix was that kept her pelvis together in the early stages. I have seen all of these wounds. The head wound (at the back) is a big head wound and is looking a lot healthier that in the early days when it was one green mass. It is like a big crater, probably 10cm x 10cm, but is now showing signs of healing. I don’t think she will need surgery on this now. This needs daily redressing as it weeps a lot.

Her wounds where they inserted the metal rods for the X-fix are deep. You could probably put your finger in and if you pushed hard enough see it coming out of the other side of her body. So far, I have resisted the temptation. But I get bored easily, so expect a photo soon of me passing a piece of string through kp’s front, coming out of the back of her body.

That will be pay-per-view only !

The head wound is still infected with MRSA and we still have to go through the rigmarole of barrier nursing (gown and gloves) which is frankly a pain-in-the-$rse. Mum’s cream arrived in the post today (the MRSA cure). I asked the nurse if we could apply it, and she said she would look into it. She hadn’t heard of it, but when I left tonight she was busy researching it on t’internet.

Veronica (kp’s friend from London) arrived today. She had been dying to see kp for ages, but couldn’t because of infection control in ICU. Also, Mark (from Southampton) and Margaret from Middlesbrough visited. kp was pleased to see all of them, but was too tired for any conversations of note. Poor Tracy and Lee (kp’s workmates) also visited, but kp hardly woke up at all during their visit. I am sure it is nothing personal Lee and Tracy !

kp has been in a LOT of pain today. She had a physio session this morning and was in tears this afternoon with the pain left from the physio.

She had 2 Tramadol for the pain and tonight had a double-dosage Fentanol Patch put on (double the dose of the last one).

This seemed to ease things.

When everyone left, kp was kn+ckered and was boiling hot, so I gave her a bedbath which exhausted her further, changed her nightie, sheets etc…with the help of a nurse and I left her very settled.

She should sleep like a baby because of the tiring day and the drugs she took before I left.

Let’s end with a vaguely humourous moment. Tommy and Eileen (our wonderful neighbours) lost Tommy’s mum last week, yesterday was the funeral. Eileen has been brilliant and has been letting the dogs out for us. Well, yesterday, I came home during the middle of the mam’s wake, and Eileen rushed to the fence to give me some food from the gathering. I am not a fan of cakes, so took the cake in to Karen to see if she might like it with a cup of tea.

Shortly after I arrived, I said to Karen :-

dp:- Karen, do you fancy a bit of cake from Tommy’s Mam’s wake ?

Veronica just laughed and commented on how appetising that sounded ?!

It was funny at the time.

Awful Night
Karen had an awful night. She had a temperature of 39′C. She was sweating so much they had to put her back on an intravenous drip of saline. Generally a very uncomfortable night.

When I arrived (8am), she was ringing wet through. I kissed her on her forehead and it was just moisture. Her sheets had so much sweat on them they were soaking. First Job was a bedbath. I asked one of the nurses to give me a hand, but in the end 2 of them came in and did it. They changed the sheets and her nighty and she felt and looked so much better after the wash. Her temperature was down to 36.6′C.

She has an infection and until the bedbath they were unsure of where it was, but it was clear after the bedbath that she has an infection where the staples were that run from the left to the right hand side of her body at the bottom of her belly. This was swabbed to see what kind of infection it is. She is on multiple anti-biotics to sort it out. We also took the opportunity to use Mum’s MRSA lotion (Ultra). We couldn’t use it on any of the wounds, but we could use it on her legs and arms.

The fan we had been using to keep kp cool had broken. We aren’t allowed mains-powered fans for some reason (they spread the germs), but they don’t seem to mind the little hand fans. I phoned Ronnie and asked if she could get a new fan.

No Breakfast
She didn’t feel like any breakfast because she still felt hot and bothered.

The Sleep
After the bedbath and getting into a nice comfy position, kp fell asleep. I was a bit tired myself so I pulled up the chair bed and got it into a prone position and hopped on with a pillow and pulled it up to Karen’s bed at the same height to form a double bed. As I did so, I banged kp’s bed. Normally any banging like this gets a “tut”, but when kp saw what I was doing (effectively lying next to her to sleep), she smiled

Occasionally I would open my eyes and check she was ok. For a lot of the time she was asleep, her eyelids were open. It was very weird. She was kind of looking into space (in each eye to a different part of space also). I will mention this to a nurse.

Elevenses
After out joint snooze, the tealady came round and offered kp some tea. She got a big beaker of tea, and kp and I shared it out into 2 cups.

kp:- Let’s have elevenses
dp:- Do you fancy some Maltesers and Minstrels ?
kp:- Yes please

Wahey. Karen normally turns chocolate down. But she was up for a cup of tea with hubby and some chocolate (courtesty of Lee + Tracy, yesterday’s visitors). That was nice

Her drip was then replaced with one that provided a higher supplement of Potassium.

Visitors
We had another snooze until Ronnie, Michelle and Adele arrived at lunchtime. They brought with them 3 mini-fans all of which sound like a plane taking off. kp wasn’t keen to keep one switched on ‘cos of the noise.

Ronnie, Michelle and Adele helped me get Karen into a nice sitting-up position when I made a real blunder causing kp a lot of pain.

Before you move kp, you need to take the slack out of the sheets and I did this fine, until I came to the head. I pulled the sheet like I would normally do, but in doing so, I moved the pillow which must have scraped kp’s head wound. It hurt a lot. Sorry Love

I am back at 6pm. No more pain love I promise.

kp was uncomfortable but had a generally settled evening. She had half a bowl of vegetable soup with a quarter of a bread bun that Glenn got from the hospital cafe.

She slept most of the evening while I filled in my Income Support forms from the DSS

Took me about 1.5 hours at which point she woke up and we did some turns to get her comfy at which point she rewarded me with :-

kp:- You are being so patient
dp:- Thanks Love. I really appreciate that, but I think it is you who is being patient.

Good Old kp.

I gave her the night’s tablets.

Switched off the drip which had just finished.

And left her to sleep……………………

Yvonne was on the early (8am-12pm), Marie on the afternoon shift (12pm-4pm) and I picked up the late (4pm-EyesShut).

kp had an unsettled morning and was sick a couple of times. I don’t think she ate much during the day, and all she had for tea was a bit of soup and one bite of a bread bun. She feels constantly nauseous. We have sussed out why now. She is on a double-dose of Fentanol for the pain and as I mentioned in a previous blog entry, this is morphine based and one of the side-effects of Morphine is constipation and nausea. Marie raised this with the nurses and the Sister called the on-call doctor who was reluctant to change the pain medication and suggested we raise it with the consultants/doctors on their rounds tomorrow.

To alleviate the sickness, kp was given a super-duper anti-sickness drug. It seemed to have done the trick as kp wasn’t sick at all on my watch.

Visitors
Karen had a conversation with Marie about visitors. For the past few days, kp has been very weak and has struggled to converse with any visitors and certainly we haven’t been laughing much over the last few days because of the problems highlighted above. She has requested less visitors. Karen really enjoyed seeing new faces just a few days ago, but we think it is tiring her out too much in her current state. So……….Please STILL ring Marie if you would like to visit Karen, but don’t be alarmed if the date/time is not in the next day or so.We are going to try and stagger the visitors to a greater degree.

Now, if Karen picks up in the next day or so, this request may change, but for now, the Queen has made her request.

Dad’s Visit
My dad made the 100-mile trip up from Lancashire today. kp was quiet for the most part, but we did have 1 gem. I had given dad an orange to peel for kp, while I degowned and went to get some cold water. Dad, like me, doesn’t go in for foods that need a lot of faff to get to the food itself and doesn’t eat oranges for this reason.

Dad:- Hey kp, if you carry on for the next 5 weeks as you have done for these first 5 weeks, you’ll be doing very well.
kp:- Do you think by then you will have peeled my orange ?

Dad only stayed about 1.5 hours because Karen was very tired.

dp snooze with kp
Like previous days, there was a time in the afternoon where kp was sleeping and I pulled up the chair bed, raised it to kp’s height and had a snooze myself (virtually alongside kp).

When we both awoke, kp said that the nurses had said next time they catch me snoozing on the chairbed, they would come in and put a wee-willy-winky nightcap on me.

After our snooze, kp + I had a really good chat for a couple of hours. We shared some tender moments, some nice hugs and just generally had a nice time.

Bowel Problems
kp has had problems with bowel movements for the past 5 days. Given the amount she has been eating, this isn’t altogether surprising, but she feels like she needs to go, but can’t. So, tonight the nurses took action and gave kp an enema and when that didn’t work a suppository. Within an hour, we had some success and for kp, some relief.

I gave kp her nighttime tablets and her Tamazepam and then it was time to go for the night………

Back at 8am.

dp

Patient Suffering
At the request of the hospital, an excerpt has been removed from this blog entry relating to another patient who cried out constantly and caused kp (and others) a great deal of distress over the past few days. It was felt it was best to tone the entry down to avoid any distress that this may cause to the family of the woman concerned. The lady died today. Our thoughts are with her husband and family.

Cracking Morning
kp had a good night’s sleep last night. She only woke up a couple of times and was snoozing when I arrived (8am).

She had a good breakfast (by kp’s usual standards). Full glass of milk, whole weetabix, and a quarter of a slice of toast after which she felt a bit sick but wasn’t.

After breakfast, I gave kp a bedbath. I am getting better & quicker at this than my first attempt. The quicker the better as far as kp is concerned, as it really tires her out. My first attempt couldn’t have been worse. I was using the wet wipes to wipe her down, but was doing the armpits before going onto her stomach with the same wet wipe. kp was not amused. Armpits are a separate wet wipe (for anyone out there who wants to do a good bedbath !!)

I got her into a nice new nightie (freshly laundered by Marie) and she looked great.

Then it was time for a turn to get her comfy before the physios came in.

I have got the turns down to a tee (if I say so myself). But I have a habit of talking through each move as I am doing it. The idea being kp knows what I am going to move next.

kp:- Will you stop telling me everything you are doing ?! You just can’t stay silent can you !

Well, there was a challenge ! So for the rest of the turn maneuvers, I didn’t say a word, and kp started giggling because she knew I was biting my tongue at every maneuver. I had a bit of a giggle myself.

She was right of course. About 5 maneuvers later, I told her my next move.

Doh !

Physios
Then 3 physios came in to give kp her workout. The family have been doing all the things they have taught us to do and the physios were pleased with the amount of movement had.

The physios however know how to give pain (all in the best interests of kp of course). Where I would stop a movement at the first “Ow !”. This physio went beyond the first, second and third “Ow !” and held her limb until kp was trying to stop the physio from holding her arm and quietly screaming. They took kp to the brink and she was very nearly in tears when they stopped. But it is all making her better.

They have set a goal for kp that she must get in the chair for lunch and dinner. kp hates the chair because she was kept in it too long on the last occasion. They assured her they would get her out after an hour this time.

After the physios left, it was time for ……….

Wash and Set
The Sister (who is lovely and I would love to name but can’t for reasons stated in earlier blog entries) came in to redress kp’s head wound. The Auxiliary who came in with her (also lovely) suggested washing kp’s hair at the same time. Well, kp loves having her hair washed. 20 minutes later, she had lovely clean looking hair, a redressed head wound and a nice new Wee Willy Winky stocking on the top.

During the wash, the Sister said she felt like “Toni and Guy” (hairdressers) and she went on to add that she wasn’t sure if “Toni and Guy” were male or female. This tickled kp and we got a big smile.

Her head wound is healing very nicely. She has such good healing skin. It is amazing.

Compliments
kp told me today how much she liked the way I moved her around the bed and that “noone could do it like me”. Thanks kp. Bet she tells everyone that !

Doctor’s Rounds
The doctors/consultants came around at lunchtime. They are going to get the Pain Specialist Nurse in to work out if there is a different form of pain relief that kp can be given that won’t make her sick all the time. They are also going to try kp on yet another type of anti-sickness.

They were pleased with her progress so far.

Sitting in Chair
The physios returned at lunchtime (as promised) and got kp upright in the chair. Within minutes of achieving the position, she was sick. Poor kp. She does look great sat in a chair however.

Marie took over with Michelle and Jane to assist. I’m back at 6pm.

Good News, Bad Evening
The good news came from Marie over the phone. Karen can read !

The physio had done Karen a timetable of physio for the next week, indicating what she must do at different times of the day. When I arrived for the evening shift, Karen was keen to show off her reading skills. With the aid of Marie holding up the magnifying sheet, Karen read out the physio plan.

kp:- 8am – David must pamper Karen with a bedbath and a massage.
dp:- I don’t think it says that love does it ?!

Nice try ! Smiles all round.

She did read it out correctly after that.

8am – Bedbath + Arm/Leg Exercises
10am – Passive Movement Machine (20mins each leg)
12pm – Get into chair for lunch
1pm – Get out of chair
3pm – Go to Pub. I have forgot the rest.

It’s just what Karen needs and has been asking for – Goals.

The physio is very switched on and is very good for Karen.

I have just remembered something from earlier today. When Karen was moved into the chair (quite a feat, involving lots of bodies), she is moved into it by lying her flat on the bed, sliding her over, and then the chair (in bed position) moves into a chair position. When she was moved into the chair position and sitting upright, she saw herself in the wall mirror for the first time, and the biggest of smiles appeared on her face. It was lovely to see.

This evening wasn’t a good evening however.

kp was sat upright for dinner, but it seems for the past few days, movements like this make her sick, and sure enough, she was. I am getting a dab hand at plucking a sick bowl from nowhere and whisking it in front of her. Unfortunately, tonight, I was that quick I nearly dislocated her jaw as my aim was a bit off. Sorry kp.

The evening continued in much the same way

After the sickness, all Karen could eat was a bite of a breadbun with lurpak on. But it didn’t sit well on her, and she had the most agonising of stomach pains. She was in a lot of discomfort. She felt like she needed a bowel movement, but couldn’t. She was lining me up for an overnight stay as she felt that unwell.

She got a little bit upset and wanted a hug. I obliged.

She is in a bit of a vicious circle at the moment. She can’t eat, because she feels nauseous all the time (despite the new anti-sickness drugs). She can’t have a bowel movement because she hasn’t eaten enough. When she does try to move her bowels, she gets exhausted because she hasn’t eaten enough. We need to break the sickness problem and I think everything will fall into line. New sickness drug tomorrow – fingers crossed. It’s a strong sea-sickness type pill which should alleviate the sickness when she gets moved.

Eventually we found a comfy position and she got an hour’s kip. Then the evening tablets came round (6 of them, but 8 to take because the bigger ones are broken up to make them easier to swallow). She got to tablet 4 and promptly threw up again.

She couldn’t face any more tablets after that.

She eventually had a bowel movement and was exhausted and gagging for sleep. The nurses changed her nighty (which was stained from the weeping wounds where her staples were) and she looked very settled and comfy.

We’ll know tomorrow if she had a good night’s sleep.

Hope so !

dp

PS – Thanks for all the flowers everyone has sent. She received a wonderfully exotic bouquet today from Sue Brady (ex work boss) which cheered her up.

WOW !
Have I got some good news for Karen’s friends and family ! I will come to that in chronological order.

Good Night’s Sleep
Karen had another good night’s sleep and this time it was without Tamazepam, simply because she threw it up. When I say a good night’s sleep, its not what I personally would call a good night’s sleep, but its what kp is happy with. She woke up a few times and was sick a few times, but for Karen that’s a good night apparently. I think the key thing is that she got some good segments of sleep.

Physio’s Timetable
One of the first things I did was to check the timetable of events that we should be following.
8am should have been breakfast followed by a bedbath. Well, no sooner had I sat kp upright for breakfast than she was sick. Of course, she didn’t want breakfast then and passed on it completely. Karen insists I buzz whenever she is sick which I duly did and a lovely auxiliary nurse (J) came in to help her and to arrange some anti-sickness drugs (taken intravenously).

The next thing on the timetable should have a bedbath followed by some physio at 10am, but the movement needed for a bedbath would have caused too much nausea and she was exhausted so the bedbath was postponed.

Instead, I got kp into a nice comfy position and she fell straight asleep. I pulled up my bed (kp’s chairbed) and brought it alongside her bed and went to sleep myself. I was exhausted as well. It sounds pathetic, but visiting really takes it out of me. I didn’t get home until the early hours of this morning, and was up at 6am walking the dogs. I went out like a light. It’s a shame the hospital is so far from home. We slept for about 90 mins-2 hours and completely b+ggered up the timetable but we both felt better for it.

Bedbath
The nurses had been in while we were asleep apparently and left us sleeping. But they returned to do the bedbath and kp really enjoyed it and had a good laugh at the same time. Two of the auxiliary nurses did it as it was felt that 2 of them would be able to do it quicker with less faff for kp. One of them is originally from Sweden (B) and still has a strong Swedish accent (although she does a mean “Way aye man”). The other auxiliary nurse (J) was talking to the Swedish one (sorry about not being able to name the nurses) (both are lovely), and was asking her to pronounce various words knowing full well that her strong Swedish accent makes the words come out strange. J was doing this to keep kp amused. Anyway, they got on to an occasion where J had asked B how she made her hotpot dish she had cooked for her husband. The ingredients she put in included various items and “piss”. Translated into English, this is “peas”, translated into Geordie, this is “peas man” (but her Swedish roots make it difficult to pronounce the “e”).

Well, Karen found this very amusing and I was laughing out loud.

Apologies if that’s not funny thirdhand, but we were in stitches.

The nurses are excellent at bringing some humour into most situations to brighten the day.

Visitor for Karen
Gill (from work) visited kp today and brought some audio books to listen to. Thanks Gill. She arrived at 11am, but because of the skewed timetable she didn’t get to see kp until 11.30am. She stayed a short time because kp was getting tired, but kp really enjoyed seeing Gill and commented afterwards that she enjoyed seeing her.

When Gill left, it was time for the physios and here comes the amazing news.

Physios Visit
The Physio (X) does an excellent job of challenging kp. No Pain, No Gain. All necessary of course !

A funny moment before the good news.

She did all the usual stretches which hurt and then got to this specific one, where she lifted Karen’s left arm (stroke side) in the air. Now this REALLY hurts.

X asked kp to watch her arm go in the air and X counted to 10 whilst holding the arm in the agonising position.

Then she got kp to count. She raised the arm into the painful position and the conversation went like this :-

X:- Now, watch your arm.
X raises kp’s arm
kp:- Ow, Ow, Ow, Owwwwwwwwwww!
X:- Count to 10 Karen
kp:- 4,5,6,7,8,9,10

Nice try love !! We were in stitches at her subtle try at shortening the duration of the pain by missing out some key numbers.

The same thing happened again and this time kp counted from 1 to 10, but really fast ! More laughs. She wasn’t intending to be funny which made it all the more funnier.

kp can read now (as mentioned in yesterday’s blog). She can also tell the time which she wasn’t able to do before, but here’s the fantastic news.

After the physio had done this painful maneuvre a few times, she asked Karen to lift her left arm (stroke side) herself. Sure enough, with X’s guiding hand, kp could lift her arm about 2 inches. FANTASTIC !!!! But it gets better !

X:- How far are you raising your arm ?
kp:- Dunno
X:- Look at your arm and raise it.

kp raised her arm about 2 inches.

X:- How far are you raising your arm ?
kp:- A lot !

Well, we all laughed because it was only a slight raise and we were ecstatic that should could do any raise at all.

The other physio (Y) raised kp’s right arm (the good one) and raised it very high and said that that is “A Lot !”

X then did some more painful maneuvres lasting about 5 minutes and got Karen to watch her left arm and raise it herself again.

Well, Karen raised her arm from the bottom to above her head (with a bit of pain). We were over the moon and spontaneously burst into a round of applause when she did it.

Is my wife a star ? Or is she a STAR !!!! So proud of you love.

kp was chuffed to bits as well. Well done !!!

Doctor’s Rounds
The doctors came round to discuss pain medication. They are going to try some new pain medication and yet some different anti-sickness drugs. She has an E. Coli infection in her water works and unfortunately it has spread to her blood stream. But the increased anti-biotics should sort that apparently. They didn’t seem unduly alarmed.

Blog Discussion
After the morning was nearly over, I was asked to see the Matron and Sister about something. I knew instantly it was about the blog. It was like being called to the Headmaster’s office (only kidding C & A). They were concerned about a previous blog entry involving a lady who was crying out a lot and that they would appreciate being told of any problems with kp’s care so they could address them rather than just read about them in the blog.

They were exceedingly nice (like Mr Kipling’s cakes) and I totally understood where they were coming from. At the same time, I expressed the importance of keeping the blog accurate so that when kp reads it, she recalls the situations in question. I offered to tone down the relevant blog entry relating to the lady (that has now been edited down). With regards letting them know of any problems, I explained that as far as we were concerned, there were no outstanding issues and I would, of course, let them know any problems with kp’s care before recording them in the blog. This is something we have done from the start and I reassured them we would continue to do so. Both C & A have the best interests of Karen and the ward at heart and I will support them in this regard whilst at the same time recording events.

What a cracking day – When I thought it couldn’t get any better…….
When I arrived tonight (7pm), kp had been having a helluva crack with Marie, Michelle and the comedian that is Jane B.

It carried on for a good 20 minutes with kp holding her belly laughing. They sleep is the best medicine, well laughter must come a close second.

Marie was keen to pass on kp’s latest good news.

1. kp had eaten nearly her whole lunch and whole dinner.
2. kp can read without the aid of the magnifying sheet.
3. kp’s itch

Eyesight
Fantastic. After this morning, my only concern was her eyesight and that looks like it is on the mend. She read out a card from Sue, Alan and Danielle Brady that had just arrived. She had read it out earlier to the girls. When she read it out to me, she got it nearly correct. She read it all out perfectly, but where the card might have said “Love and Best Wishes”, kp said “All the best”. I didn’t say anything. It reminded me of a child reading when they think they know what the next bit says, but can’t quite read the words out. I think she was just tired.

All the work is done through her left eye (stroke side strangely). Her right eye can’t see at all. This has been referred to an eye specialist.

The Itch
Another thing Marie relayed from the afternoon, was that kp had an itch on her left side and she instinctively tried to move her LEFT arm to scratch it. Previously, her left arm just sat there like a dead weight and now it was moving on an impulse.

Me + kp
A few more belly laughs later and it was time for the girls to return to Middlesbrough. That left me and kp for the evening.

We sat and had a chat about what I had done on the afternoon (mow the grass) and a few other titbits.

J, the auxiliary nurse, came in and together we gave kp a bedbath and changed a dressing that was weeping. With new Nighty on, kp looked very settled. Unfortunately within an hour of the bedbath, kp’s nighty was in a right state because the pelvic wound was weeping badly. They are going to sort that out later this evening.

E. Coli 156
Before Marie left, she told me that had a certain strain of E. Coli in her bloodstream. Apparently, there are many strains, but the strain kp has E.Coli 156 (which I am sure we are all familiar with ) isn’t too bad, whereas another strain is bad. She is on an IV drip of Omoxycilin to sort this. I say she is on a drip. The doctor came round and simply couldn’t get a new Venflon (sp) into her vein to give her the drip. The doctor tried about 3 different places and then referred it to the Senior House Doctor to sort. That was being done later tonight as well.

kp has the worst veins in the world. When she used to give blood, they always struggled to find a good vein.

Sickness Cracked ?
kp wasn’t and didn’t feel sick at all tonight despite lots of moves. So we may have the sickness cracked now. I do hope so, because it makes the day much worse for kp. Finger Crossed, Touch Wood Etc…

Stiff Left Arm
Tonight her left arm (stroke side) was a bit stiff after all the physio. So I did all the exercises we have been taught to loosen it up and then asked Karen to lift her arm (as she had done earlier). It takes a lot of concentration for her to tell the muscles to move in a certain way. But, unlike the physio, I didn’t guide Karen, I just waited until there was a bit of movement in the right direction and then coaxed her on.

Well, when the arm lifted to her head, I started crying. She was lifting her arm, without ANY support from me. I couldn’t have been happier. kp did a huge smile, because she knew how much it meant to me. Hugs time !

But then of course, I got carried away.

Can you bend your fingers ?
Tiniest of Bends

Can you bring your arm to your chest ?
Yes

Can you do this …..?

Can you do that …..?

kp:- David, I am not a performing animal !
dp:- Sorry love.

She knew I was excited and it was a nice way to end a dp physio session.

kp Phone Home
kp has made such progress over the past 24 hours, I thought we could see if she could do something practical which she hadn’t been able to do previously, namely use the phone. This was a problem before, because her hand-eye coordination was poor and when she tried to replace the phone on the tv (where it sits), she would just end up pushing the tv away. She also couldn’t dial because she couldn’t see the numbers.

So, I brought the phone into range, and suggested making a phonecall.

kp:- I’ll phone Marie

Sure enough, she could lift the phone off & dial the number. A huge smile appeared when Marie picked up at the other end. I think she was chuffed with herself. Could she replace the headset however ? You better believe she could !

That’s about all I can remember.

So, all in all, an absolute cracker of a day. I can’t help but think back to something F said, (the consultant in ICU). He said the patients in Intensive Care that do the best are the ones that make slow steady progress,. I am ever so slightly concerned that kp is doing too well. Stupid really. She is not in ICU, so maybe it no longer applies, but its at the back of my mind. It’s also on kp’s mind. She doesn’t know F said this, but she said to me yesterday :-

kp:- It’s just my luck that after all this effort and progress that something else comes along and kills me off.

Obviously I reassured her to the contrary.

Well done Love for today. You’re storming !!!!

dp
xxxxx

Karen had slept well, but been in a lot of pain when she woke up.

It is very difficult to get the right blend of pain/nausea medication. It seems the balance has shifted from nausea to pain. No sickness at all, but kp is constantly in pain.This challenge continues today. kp is going to try Diazepam today to see if that helps.

Not much to report from this morning.

Bedbath, New Nighty.

Both kp + I slept for an hour or so.

Her limbs had stiffened up a bit since last night, so I did a bit of physio to try and loosen them up.

The Doctor came to report that the E.Coli infection is on the wane thanks to the Amoxycillin IV drip, which is great.

That’s about it.

I got called into the visitor’s room for another meeting about the blog. This time it was the physios who were concerned about identifying them by one of their initials. And also one of the physios felt that yesterday’s Part One made it sound like they were giving kp too much pain. Neither kp + I believe this to be the case. We think they are doing a sterling job and to be fair I think the blog reflected this, but to save any upset, I have anonymised the Physios initials and toned down the specific comment that was referred to in the meeting.