On the way to the hospital, I picked up some fresh bread rolls to have with the home made Tomato Soup I had made with the help of Mr Henry Heinz.

I read out some blog stuff to kp, and went through some post she had received from work. We took our time and were in no rush.

Whilst I was running the bath, I got a bit bored, and saw some sit-down weighing scales. Well, I had to weigh myself. It’s a long time since I have.

13 stone 4 lbs MY ARSE !!!!! Our scales at home say I am about 12 stone and a half. I told kp as soon as I got back to the room.

dp:- So please will you tell those scales when we go in the bathroom that they are LIARS !
kp murmured, probably thinking “You are a bit podgy!”

Well, when we went into the bathroom, she stood my ground for me :-

dp:- Those are the scales love
kp (looking at the scales):- You lie ! My husband is not 13 stone.

Actually, I just jumped on the scales at home to check, and they say I am 8 stone 4lbs and the longer I stand on them (they are digital scales), the less I weigh. I think the ones at the hospital could be right

You shouldn’t have scales in a bathroom anyway. And I did have all my clothes on, and lots of change in a pocket and a watch, and I could do with a haircut.

Back to kp.

Bath was great although a little on the hot side. kp likes a hot bath, but today it was the hottest it has ever been 41.4′C. She had to be lowered in bit by bit. But she loved it. I thought she’d be out in 5 mins, but after the wash routine, she soaked for a LONG 15 minutes. When she came out of the bath, she looked like a lobster. She was boiling !

Just before lunch, we went outside for some cool air. It took a bit of the red shine of kp, but not much.

For lunch, kp had her best t-shirt and shorts on for the main man and I had visions of tomato soup going everywhere, so I put an apron on kp. Normally, I just give her a serviette. I took the cup of the thermos flask and the tomato soup dripped on the table, my hands and the floor. The seal had broken

kp ate all her tomato soup and the apron wasn’t touched. Sod’s Law !

Physio followed. Interesting start to physio. kp was hoisted onto the bench and then the main man got kp to go on her back by herself. She did it with only the slightest help. It was amazing to see. I think I’ll faint the first time she stands by herself.

Physio consisted of lots of muscle strengthening exercises and then the finale was a stand, but a stand with a difference. This time, the physio did virtually nothing. It looked like he just made sure that she didn’t fall over during the maneuver. So, kp had to do all the stand herself. It REALLY was a LOT LOT harder than previous stands, and I would say she got to about 80% of the stand position, but no matter how hard she gripped her teeth, the legs wouldn’t lengthen that extra bit.

Now, you may think we would be disappointed at this, because I, for one, thought kp had been doing more for herself on previous attempts, but we weren’t. The main man was impressed with how well she had come in the last week. And I think we needed to see that she wasn’t at standing yet. What we saw today was kp’s standing ability with pretty much no assistance. She was tantalizingly close. Another week or two and I think she’ll be doing it on her own (that’s a dp guess, and is accurate to within a month either way).

Physio over and it was time for the arm ultrasound scan (to check for blood clots). I found this very interesting. It was just like they do to check on babies in wombs, although they are not looking for babies (no, seriously !). It took about 15 minutes, and I could pick out kp’s windpipe when she did her neck and could pick out blood pumping through veins when she turned a certain switch, but apart from that it was rocket science to me.

The end result is that she didn’t think kp had any blood clots, but the report would say that she also had great difficulty in finding kp’s veins because the blood flow was so restricted. kp’s has awful veins. People hate taking blood from her.

kp was KN+CKERED at the end of this and just wanted to go to sleep. I’ll get wronged for saying this, but she was falling asleep in physio. The main man has a very soothing voice, and when he says “relax your legs” to Karen, her eyelids very nearly close. She didn’t nod off, but if it weren’t for some exertion on her part, she would have and that’s no disrespect to the physio, she is just so tired most of the time.

kp went to sleep after the ultrasound scan. Marie arrived and I left. Poor Marie. I doubt kp will wake up until tomorrow. Fingers crossed she has some conscious moments.

When I got home, I was greeted by this sight :-

Click on the picture to see it in more detail

Tommy (our neighbour) had made a ramp for kp’s wheelchair. I had mentioned that she could be coming home within a few weeks and that the front two steps (very close together) would be tricky. He offered me some help making a ramp. That’s like offering a blind man a pair of glasses. DIY + dp = DeathTrap.

I accepted his offer of help and awaited the call to say “give me a hand”.

Alakazam !

The job’s a good ‘un. It’s a done deal.

Thank you SOOOOOOOOOO much Tommy for the ramp. It is spot on. And thanks to Eileen who kept the dogs at bay and trimmed back the jungle so Tommy could get in to do his thing. You’re both stars in our eyes.

I’ll leave you with a piccie of the ramp from the other direction :-

Click on the picture to see it in more detail

Hot Chicken Today so I was a little late arriving – still plenty of time for the bath.

She wanted it 40′C today instead of 41.4′C. Her wish is my command. 40′C was served up and she had another long soak.

After the bath, it was time for lunch. Lovely with a big portions of chips

The sister popped in to see if kp had told me the results of the arm scan. No clots, but something like “her veins are very restricted in her left arm”. We both understood what she said, but it dawned on us after she left that we didn’t know what it meant (implications-wise). So no doubt we will follow this up next time we see her or the doctor. We are not overduly worried.

kp got in her chair at 11.45am to dry her hair and get ready for lunch (12pm). She stayed in the chair all the way through until physio ! We even managed a trip outside in the lovely weather.

dp:- Do you like coming outside ?
kp:- It’s alright
dp:- Well, it’s a change of scenery isn’t it ?
kp:- David, we are sitting in a car park !

LOL ! I think I appreciate the outside trips more than her.

1pm we were in the physio room ready. Today was american football. kp was in “sideline” as the main man causes it, “on her side” to you and me. But, she was very “on her side”, teetering between falling forward or backwards, so I was employed to steady her hips, while all the action went on with her arms.

Today, 90% of the session focussed on kp’s left arm. He moved kp’s arm and asked her if she could feel him moving it ?

Main Man :- Can you feel me moving your arm ?
kp :- No
Main Man :- What about now ? (different move)
kp :- No

He did loads of exercises on her left arm, but she was in quite a bit of discomfort on her side which was distracting her.

Later on in the session after he had loosened her arm a bit, he asked her if she could feel him moving her arm and in what direction and she could and guessed the direction correctly also !!

He then got a blue football from his cupboard and positioned it in Karen’s right hand, and got kp’s left hand on top of the ball and asked her to move the ball up and down. For 5 minutes, there was VERY little movement and the main man had to initiate the move, but by the end of the session, she could slowly move the ball in each direction with a bit of control.

The session finished with a stand which she did well with assistance.

On the way back to the bedroom, I asked kp how she thought it went.

kp:- I’ll tell you when I get back to the room

When we got back to the room, she told me she didn’t feel very positive after that session. It was a long session (70 mins+) and I think she felt she didn’t have much to show at the end of it. She was uncomfortable for a lot of the session also which didn’t help.

She didn’t have too long to dwell on it, because she was tired and we both went to sleep for 90 mins until Marie, Adele, Abbie and Louisa came in. We had a good laugh with them and I left them in their company.

That’s it for now.

dp

Little to report.

Left arm still giving her gip. The main man taught me a little maneuvre that gives her some relief (dislocate kp’s shoulder, turn her arm round 360′ and then relocate her shoulder). Well, actually, it’s not quite that drastic, but it does work for an hour or so.

Before the bath, kp + I had a snooze for about an hour, until she got her pain patch changed (every 3 days).

That’s about it. Very uneventful morning. It always seems a bit quieter on the ward on a weekend.

Pizza night tonight

kp had a very quiet afternoon with Michelle. By quiet, I mean that she wasn’t full of beans or in the mood for talking.

When I arrived this evening, she told me that she can sense her mood is changing. I forgot to mention that the other day we had both had a talk about the situation and we had both said that we were fed up with it now :-

dp:- It’s like “ok, we have had the accident, we’ve done the lying in bed thing, we’ve done the trying to stand thing, right now let it end and let’s get back to normality”
kp:- Yeah, that’s it exactly.

I want kp home, she wants to come home. I think we both (kp moreso) have to come to terms with a different reality. It’s easy to say “this is a long haul trip”, but to live it, well that’s the tricky bit. There are no easy answers, there is no right thing to say, there is just a big challenge ahead. Technically, she has travelled the hardest part of the road, and she was asleep for that, so following that through, if she is awake, she’ll be able to crack anything.

I sense a little dip in the road ahead, but when it’s needed kp will bring out her shovel and fill it in and then ride all over it with a steam roller.

Tonight was subdued. We enjoyed the X-factor and our pizza, but it was a small bit of sun shining through a cloudy room. She was tired after that so didn’t have any more thought processes left to mull over her situation.

Tomorrow is a new day and we think, (but aren’t sure), that vdfromboro (Veronica Dennison from Middlesbrough) is visiting tomorrow. That should perk kp up no end.

And then we have the Bank Holiday Get-Together for Adele’s Birthday, so some nice bits of action to keep her mind off things.

Fingers crossed !

dp

I was interested this morning to see what kp’s mood was after the previous night. It could have been better, it could have been worse. She was “ok”. She has been on the same anti-depressant I have been on (Citalopram) for about 2 months. I know, from experience, that it takes the edge off really bad situations and doesn’t make them feel as bad as you perceive them to be.

I feel sure this is helping her at the moment.

We had a good chat first thing this morning, talking about this very thing and other mood-related topics. We didn’t solve anything, but “it’s good to talk”.

After the chat and before the bath, we had a snooze for about 45 minutes. It was all we needed to give us enough energy and zest for the bath.

After the bath, we had a cup of tea and some hobnobs. At 12.45pm, Marie and Veronica arrived. Both kp and I had been looking forward to seeing vdfromboro. Within minutes of her arrival, the girls were in “full gossip” mode. I could feel my eyes getting heavy and another snooze coming on. I went in the bathroom for a lie-down and 90 minutes later, they were still gossiping but were due a Tea-break to lubricate their vocal chords.

Tea-break, more gossip and then it was time for me to check out of the talk shop. I can still hear all 3 of them gossiping and I am 18 miles away.

Tomorrow is Adele’s Party, so we’ll try and get some photos to complement what should be a fun time to report.

Shortly after I arrived and we had chatted for a while, kp + I both decided to have a snooze as we had PLENTY of time for a bath. Midway through the snooze, Uncle Bernard (and Lauren) arrived with a card for Adele’s Birthday Bash. They ended up staying for 30 minutes or so and we had a really good natter with them about various issues. By the time they left, we no longer were tired and did the bath thing.

I had brought some makeup in for kp the other day. So, as well as “doing her hair”, she also puts her lippy on and other makeup things (too complicated for me). Speaking of too complicated, I had to bring in her flip-up compact with “foundation” in. I had specific instructions which one. When I got back home, I delved into the depths of the makeup drawer to find 4 what appeared to be IDENTICAL compacts, all slightly different states of usage and what appeared to be different shades. I had to “use the force Luke” to bring the right one in, but I nailed it, either that or kp’s eyesight is bad enough for me to get away with a wrong shade.

So by 1.30pm we were all set for the party (due to start at 2pm) and she looked great. I persuaded kp to greet the first guests outside as it was a glorious day today. She wasn’t keen to go outside, but she did it for me. Here’s kp with vdfromboro (pronounced BOWROW) outside the Jubille entrance

It wasn’t long before all the guests arrived. Michelle was 30 minutes late, but that’s her trademark and we love her still.

We all had instructions from Karen and Marie. I was on soft drinks, Adele was on nibbles, Marie was on Corned Beef Pie and Fancies, Michelle was on Vegetarian stuff and Yvonne was on the cake (and other stuff). It worked out brilliantly and it was cracking fayre.

The nurses had kindly said we could use “the day room” for the party (sorry kp, the “get-together”). kp doesn’t like me calling it a party.

We all tucked in and stuffed our faces – the food/drinks was lovely and a smashing example of how a family can pull together to produce a cracking feast.

After the food, it was time for the day’s highlight, the moment we had all been looking forward to, namely Yvonne’s Salsa demonstration. kp had been in stitches when she did it in her bedroom, and we were all gagging to see Yvonne strut her stuff. UNFORTUNATELY, she wanted to change it in to a Salsa Dance Class. YIKES !!!!!!!!!!!!!! All of a sudden, everyone of us had an excuse why we couldn’t do it. Mobile phones popped out of people’s pockets to pretend we each wanted to record the event so “therefore” couldn’t be involved. Some people needed the loo, some people downright said “no” (yvonne’s son and husband initially).

Karen had the only real excuse, but thankfully I got out of it referring to the blog, the need to record it etc…

It started with a demonstration by Yvonne….

it was quite lengthy….

but it did finish eventually….the following day….

In no time, everyone was up……….

kp was amused…………

Abbie(8) took centre stage for a while. She is great and has natural rhythm (just like me (ahem))…

Freddie took to the floor with his dance partner Louisa (2) …..

A good time was had by all…………

Some people weren’t too keen on dancing, but motorbikes were a big attraction ….

^^ Ethan wearing kp’s gloves, helmet and my boots

Marie became very aware that kp would normally have been the first one up dancing and the last one down sitting but of course she can’t, so she suggested something that she thought kp would have been able to do and that she enjoyed, namely “Charades”. kp has a reputation for charades. She is the most participative and CERTAINLY the loudest competitor. Well, it started off great and kp was her usual boisterous self for the first round, but she then became a bit quieter. It was soon “her turn” and it became very clear that she couldn’t participate with only one arm in operation. I was sad but didn’t let it show, so was Marie. I suspect everyone else was feeling the same, but none of us let it show. I asked Karen if she wanted me to take her go, and she said “yes”. Our team won, which was great, but this didn’t take away from the fact that this is one of the many things that Karen can’t do, and perhaps won’t be able to do again in the future. It is very sad and I have shed a few tears over this (as has Marie) when we got to our homes.

Before I came home, I asked kp how she felt about not being able to dance or play charades. She said words to the effect of “it was no big deal”, but I am pretty confident that this is a bit of a front to protect us (the star she is). I KNOW she has SO MANY of these kind of situations to face in the future. In hospital, you can’t fully realise what the implications are of having a bad arm/hand. kp knows this also in theory, but the practice of it is going to be very hard to bear. kp enjoys all the things that need 2 working hands and I don’t think it is until she tries to garden, read, walk the dogs, etc etc… that she will realise her full predicament. I feel so sorry for her.

That aside, she has still had a good day. She stayed in the chair for a WHOPPING 2 hours 45 minutes !!!!!! TROUNCING her previous record by at least an hour ! She said she could have done more also.

It was a great day overall, we all enjoyed it, but it was also a day that showed us all that we don’t have the same kp (in body) that we did before. In some ways, this is good, because our ear drums remain intact in a game of charades, but obviously we yearn for the old kp back. I know in time, she will get louder, but I will miss seeing her do the charades and strutt her stuff on the dancefloor. Who knows, one day, she may regain enough strength and ability to dance and do charades. The dancing I can see, but I fear it may be one-handed charades

dp

Video Footage of kp and the party to follow within 24 hours when my mate Nigel Gibbs strutts HIS stuff and converts my video footage to “viewable over the web” footage. It’s funny stuff imho. I was LOLing when I saw it back

Sung to The Three Lions :- “She’s coming home, she’s coming home, Karen is coming home (for a visit)” (You have to sing “for a visit” VERY quickly)

What a day. It started off bad (for me) and got better and better.

I hadn’t had much sleep last night, caused by a late night at the hospital, a long blog to write, an upset stomach over the night and dogs needing to be let out. I was exhausted this morning when I arrived and wanted to go straight to snooze, but it wouldn’t have been fair on kp to arrive and then sleep. So we chatted and I showed her the video footage took from the party. She had loads of smiles as she watched it. It was such a good day, it really broke the monotony of hospital life.

The video footage is now available (courtesy of IT-PS.com and Nigel Gibbs). The clips are quite long downloads and could take from 3 minutes to 30 minutes to download depending on your connection speed.

Yvonne and KP – Part One
Yvonne and KP – Part Two
Michelle dancing to “Making yer mind up” (Bucks Fizz) – Part One
Michelle dancing to “Making yer mind up” (Bucks Fizz) – Part Two
Michelle dancing to “Making yer mind up” (Bucks Fizz) – Part Three
Michelle “Line Dancing”
All Together Now

So, back to today. I was quite ratty this morning and if a bed component didn’t work correctly, or a sheet didn’t tuck under kp when I told it to, then I was getting annoyed with it. I apologised to kp and explained why, she was understanding

We pretty much went straight into the bath. Well, I didn’t but it’s big enough to get two in ! We were back in time for lunch, but kp didn’t feel like any Chicken Pie and instead opted to put her makeup on. Snooze followed (yay !) and we slept from about 12.25pm until 2.20pm. I was out for the count as soon as my head hit the pillow.

10 minutes later we were in the physio room. The session started off with kp transferring from the wheelchair to the bench (WITHOUT the hoist). The main man helped but kp did a lot of the work herself. Not bad for having no warm up ! He then proceeded to put kp through a whole stack of exercises which she did from the sitting position. Some of them looked really hard. She had to get her legs really wide and virtually have one on the bench while the other was on the floor with a slight lean to the side. I am sure it must be a woman-specific exercise, because I didn’t even attempt this one as it looks so torturous on the nether regions. She did very well and I think the exercises were designed to strengthen kp’s left leg and her ability to lock her knee (crucial for standing on her own).

After this the main man introduced the “swivel standing thing”. I must find out what they call it, but it allows kp to transfer more easily from A to B. Basically, it involves kp standing up on this swivelling platform from surface A, someone whizzing it round so her bum is over surface B and then kp sitting. kp didn’t understand how it worked, she looked daunted.

She asked

kp:- “Will you show me what I have to do before I do it ?”
Main Man (laughing) :- “Yes, don’t worry, we’re not just going to ask you to do it.”

Basically, kp grabs the rail on the gadget with her good arm (for stability), does a stand and then it rotates, and she sits down.

She stills needs quite a bit of assistance to stand, but the main man and his assistant (who is a big Daniel O’Donnell fan) got her standing onto the platform.

The session was finished with kp standing on the gadget, swivelling round to the wheelchair and sitting down. She did really well. The main man believes that she isn’t quite ready to do this with just me present and that she needs to get stronger in her standing before she can do it with no physios present. I fully agree. In typical fashion, kp asked when she might be ready to do it without physios present.

And here comes the good news…………

Main Man :- Well, not this weekend, but the following weekend should see you strong enough.

He wisely added some cautions that “it isn’t set in stone” etc etc…..but it was great to hear talk of a visit home. kp understands that it may not be next weekend, but it has given her something to aim for. I asked if there was anything we can do to maximise the chance of that weekend, and we now have a set of exercises to do that will help strengthen key muscles.

So, fingers crossed, with a following wind, kp may be at home for a visit on the 10th September weekend.

She was absolutely thrilled with just hearing talk of “going home”, and when we got back to the room, she put her fist in the air and waved it around. We had a group hug (ALL TWO OF US). It was great to see her so happy. She will go all out to make sure she is strong enough to go home. I just hope she doesn’t have any infections or knockbacks in the next 10 days. She does have the start of a cold today.

It wasn’t long after we got back from physio that Vivian arrived, one of kp’s work mates. She shed a few tears when she saw kp, which was nice. kp couldn’t believe that she was upset over her.

Vivian and kp talked like they were back at work and had a good conflab.

After about 30 minutes Marie and Ronnie arrived and it was time for me to go.

An excellent day overall. Some great news and something big to aim for !

Well, it would be hard to top yesterday with news, but I am pleased that we have something better to report. Thats better !

Today I arrived early to get kp bathed and ready for an early physio at 10.45pm. No time for lipstick this morning (for kp that is).

No hoisting was done at all today, kp doing all her own transfers from the wheelchair to the bench and back again. Actually come to think of, she never sat on the bench and did all her work today in standing. Just before she stood up from the wheelchair, she was eyeing up the physios arms and she said :-

kp:- X, I must tell you. I could get blood from your arm no problem. You have great veins.

We all laughed. There then followed a discussion on blood donoring and I think kp may have persuaded X to give blood again in the future. Lee would be proud.

She stood from the wheelchair with help from the main man and his cohort. At one point during her stand, she wasn’t being assisted AT ALL apart from the very slightest pressure on her left knee, but I think this was more for the main man to feel if she was about to fall rather than to assist her maintaining the stand. He got her to raise her arm in the air whilst transferring weight between legs and she did it great

All pictures can be made larger by clicking on them

That is the first time I have been able to truly gauge how much assistance she needs. Don’t get me wrong, she does A LOT of the work herself, but when the physios have their hands on her (as they nearly always do), you just don’t know true percentages of how much work she is doing. I would say she was
doing the stand 80% herself
maintaining the stand 80% herself, but later in the session 98% herself

So, the physio got her to transfer her weight from one leg to the other. At first her left leg needed a lot of persuading to lock and hold the weight, but kp, after a while, got the hang of locking her left knee. It doesn’t come naturally at all, but she can do it if she really thinks about it.

Then without any warning with all her weight on her left leg, he asked her to move her right leg forward a step. She did it brilliantly, HER FIRST STEP ! When she was safely on that leg, he asked her to do the same with her left leg. Now remember kp has little sensation and awareness of the left leg but she moved her left leg forward. It didn’t look at all as fluid as the right leg, in fact it looked like she was moving her left knee forward by taxing the thigh muscles and the rest of the leg (knee downwards) just dragged along the floor. She was completely unaware of this as the physio helped her left foot come forward. She was so chuffed. This continued for another 2 steps, making a total of 4 steps in total. I was so proud. I have learned from previous days NOT to tell kp how much assistance she was getting and just to praise the positive. She has done absolutely superbly I have no doubt about that, but I think kp thinks she has done 4 steps and that her left worked as well as her right.

It was actually quite sad to see her left foot/shin just drag along the floor, but in time, hopefully she will be able to get more movement out of it.

During the session, kp was asked to open her left hand fully. She opened it “fully” and looked at her hand and it was only partially opened.

kp:- You see X, I think that hand is fully opened but its not.

He went on to explain that the body thinks things are in a certain position because it has learned how much exertion is required to do various positions. In a nutshell, this explains quite a lot of things we have seen about Karen. She thinks her left leg is locked, when it isn’t, she thinks her bum is tucked in (for standing) when it is sticking out etc etc…..It was very interesting.

But hopefully, she can relearn these things. While we are talking about kp’s left side, she has a LOT less feeling in it than in her right. I can put the cold shower on her left leg and sometimes she feels it, sometimes she doesn’t. She can have a bit of food on her left cheek and not know it’s there. I can hold her left hand and she is unaware of it sometimes. I was stroking her thumbnail (left side) today, and she had no idea.

I don’t want to make today’s physio sound negative, because she took her first steps, but there is still a long way to go.

kp was over the moon with today’s session and no sooner had she got back to the room than she was phoning all the family with the good news.

We didn’t have too long to think about her achievement as we had arranged for me to go and pick Angela up and bring her in. Angela is the other lady who was in the car in the accident. She is out of hospital now and can walk a few steps unaided which is amazing to see. We thoroughly enjoyed hearing about her experiences at home/walking etc….It really is like someone is testing the ground before we walk on it (pardon the pun).

Here is a photo of kp and Angela having a cup of tea in the cafe at the hospital. We also enjoyed a Fish Supper in kp’s room.

When I returned from taking Angela home again, we had a little natter before Jane, Michelle and Ronnie arrived. It was heavy conversation in no time. Bras, Tops, etc…. They had been shopping for kp and were all threatening to get their breasts out to try things on. Definately my cue to leave. There may have been only 4 women in the room, but there was more breast in that room than any man should have to see in a day.

When I got home, I was greeted with this site.

Tommy (our ace neighbour) had only built another ramp to go up the final step into the house and it also provides a bigger platform on which kp could be turned around in her wheelchair. Thanks again Tommy. Your DIY skills are nearly as good as mine (ahem !).

Here’a a closeup

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